Day 3 of Jokes: the Couple from Hell!

Some Place Expensive!

Today is the final day that we look in on the “couple from hell!”

Enjoy!

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace
expensive…

So, I took her to a gas station.
And then the fight started…

~~~~~

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, ‘I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3
seconds.’

I bought her a scale.

And then the fight started…

~~~~~

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.

She asked, ‘What’s on TV?’

I said, ‘Dust.’

And then the fight started…

~~~~~

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security.

The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver’s license to verify my age.

I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.

The woman said, ‘Unbutton your shirt.’

So I opened my shirt, revealing my curly silver hair.

She said, ‘That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me.’  And she processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the
Social Security office.

She said, ‘You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
disability, too.’

And then the fight started…

~~~~~

Let’s talk about fishing tomorrow!

This blog is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

More Jokes — Four for the Fifth (of July)

Here's to a Guy who Doesn't Understand Women!

Well, the holiday is almost over!  My friend, Dorothy139, sent some jokes. Because they are so long, I’ve divided them into 3 parts.  This is Part 2.

Today’s Jokes

I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95.

Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95.

I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream.

And then the fight started….

~~~~~

A woman was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.

She was not happy with what she saw and said to her husband, ‘I feel
horrible; I look old, fat and ugly.  I really need you to pay me a compliment.’

The husband replies, ‘Your eyesight’s damn near perfect.’

And then the fight started……

~~~~~

I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my
order first.

“I’ll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.”

He said, “Aren’t you worried about the mad cow?”"

Nah, she can order for herself.”

And then the fight started…

~~~~~

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and
I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
nearby table.

My wife asked, ‘Do you know her?’

‘Yes,’ I sighed, ‘She’s my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking           right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn’t
been sober since.’

‘My God!’ said my wife, ‘who would think a person could go on celebrating         that long?’

And then the fight started…

~~~~~

This blog is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Some Jokes for the Fourth, Fifth and Sixth!

Hope you are enjoying the holiday as much as I am!  My friend, Dorothy139, sent some jokes.  Because they are so long, I’ll divide them into 3 parts. Enjoy!

Today’s Jokes

Anniversary Gift!

I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go for our anniversary?”
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.

“Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!” she said.

So I suggested, “How about the kitchen?”

And that’s when the fight started…..

~~~~~

My wife and I were watching ‘Who Wants To Be A Millionaire’ while we
were in bed.

I turned to her and said, “Do you want to have sex?” “No,” she answered.

I then said, “Is that your final answer?”

She didn’t even look at me this time, simply saying “Yes.”

So I said, “Then I’d like to phone a friend..” 

And that’s when the fight started….

~~~~~

Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch,
grabbed the  dog, and slipped quietly into the garage.

I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into
A torrential downpour.

The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage,
turned on the  radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.

I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into
bed.

I cuddled up to my wife’s back, now with a different anticipation,
and whispered, ‘The weather out there is terrible.’

My loving wife of 10 years replied, ‘Can you believe my stupid
husband is out fishing in that?’

And then the fight started …

~~~~~

A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies.  Suddenly, at 3 o’clock in the morning, a loud noise came from outside.

The woman, bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man
‘Holy Shit. That must be my husband!’

So the man jumped out of the bed; scared and naked – jumped out the
window. He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bush and to his car as fast as he could go.

A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and screamed at the woman, ‘I AM your husband!’

The woman yelled back, ‘Yeah, then why were you running?’

And then the fight started……

~~~~~

Keep smilin’ & More Tomorrow!

This blog is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

New Product Lines @ EasyOnlineOrdering.com

News Flash

I’ve added three new product lines to my site: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Until recently, I’ve talked about fishing but did not carry any fishing equipment. That has changed.

AC or DC Aerator Motor

Fishing Accessories

The items I’ve added include:  fishing rod racks, mesh bait cages (of various sizes), fishing rod holders (on land and in a boat), a variety of sportsman’s scales (both spring & hook and dial-type), a collapsible telescopic bait net and a floating wading basket.

I’ve added some unusual items: outboard motor carrier, boat dolly and a 300 lb. trailer dolly.

Universal One-Man Canoe Loader

WaterCraft

I’ve added a universal one-man canoe loader.  If you’ve ever tried to carry your canoe on your vehicle, you can see how useful this product is!

With so many folks taking “stay-cations” — staying near home — tubes and tow-ables are wildly popular. Kids, teens and adults can have a great time – for a reasonable (and discounted) price.

Fusion Towable

ATV Covers

Camo-Colored Covers

We’ve carried Camo-Clad and a variety of camo products for a long while. However, I found a source for standard black and camo-colored covers for a variety of items. If you need a cover for your riding lawnmower, slow plow, etc., take a look!

This line will increase in the coming weeks.

Thanks

I haven’t done a shameless plug for my website in several months. Thanks for letting me tell you about some new products.

I’ll return soon with more info about fishing.

Have a GREAT 4th of July!!

Sample: Keep a Log of Your Catches

A Sample Fish Log

Name ____________________     Date _______________________

Location __________________    GPS Info ____________________

INFO                     Fish #1           Fish #2           Fish #3           Fish #4

Species               ______            ______          ______          ______

=============================================

Time Caught     ______           ______          ______          ______

Weight                ______           ______          ______          ______

Length                ______           ______          ______          ______

BAIT USED =====================================

Lures (which)  ______           ______          ______           ______

Size                      ______           ______          ______           ______

Live Bait (kind)_____            ______           ______          ______

Live Bait (size)______          ______           ______          ______

FISHING DEPTH =================================

in feet                 ______          ______          ______          ______

WHERE ======================================

Open water     ______          ______          ______          ______

Creek                ______           ______         ______           ______

River                ______           ______         ______           ______

Lake                 ______           ______         ______           ______

Pond                ______           ______         ______           ______

Weeds             ______           ______         ______           ______

Rocks              ______           ______         ______           ______

On Bottom    ______           ______         ______           ______

With Bobber______           ______         ______           ______

Dock/Pier     ______           ______         ______           ______

In Boat           ______           ______         ______           ______

Other              ______           ______         ______           ______

Other              ______           ______         ______           ______

TYPE OF FISHING =============================

Bait Casting  ______           ______         ______           ______

Fly Fishing   ______           ______         ______           ______

Spinning       ______           ______          ______           ______

Still Fishing ______           ______         ______           ______

Trolling        ______           ______         ______           ______

SPEED ======================================

Slow Reel.   ______           ______         ______           ______

Med. Reel.  ______           ______         ______           ______

Fast Reel.    ______           ______         ______           ______

==========================================

A Sample Fish Log

Name __Marylouise_________      Date ____6/1/2009___________

Location _Brenham, TX_______    GPS Info ____________________

INFO                     Fish #1           Fish #2           Fish #3           Fish #4

Species               perch_            crappie          ______          ______

============================================

Time Caught     _7:53 am       8:35 am         ______          ______

Weight                10.5 ozs           _13 ozs         ______          ______

Length                _8″ ___           _9.25_           ______          ______

BAIT USED ====================================

Lures (which)  ______           ______          ______           ______

Size                      ______           ______          ______           ______

Live Bait (kind)minnow         minnow         ______           ______

Live Bait (size)  _1″___          __2″__           ______           ______

FISHING DEPTH ================================

in feet                 __3′__          ___5′__          ______          ______

WHERE ======================================

Open water     ______          ______          ______          ______

Creek                ___x__           ___x__         ______           ______

River                ______           ______         ______           ______

Lake                 ______           ______         ______           ______

Pond                ______           ______         ______           ______

Weeds             ______           ___x__         ______           ______

Rocks              ______           ______         ______           ______

On Bottom    ___x__           ______         ______           ______

With Bobber______           ______         ______           ______

Dock/Pier     ______           ______         ______           ______

In Boat           ______           ______         ______           ______

Other              ______           ______         ______           ______

Other              ______           ______         ______           ______

TYPE OF FISHING ==============================

Bait Casting  __x___           __x___         ______           ______

Fly Fishing   ______           ______         ______           ______

Spinning       ______           ______          ______           ______

Still Fishing __x___           ______         ______           ______

Trolling        ______           ______         ______           ______

SPEED =====================================

Slow Reel.   ______           ______         ______           ______

Med. Reel.  ___x__           ___x__         ______           ______

Fast Reel.    ______           ______         ______           ______

==========================================

Don’t rely on your memory; it’s plays tricks on you! We tend to remember our failures and forget our successes.

By keeping a log, you can try a variety of things and know which of your new ideas work — and when you need to go back to the tried-and-true!

See you soon!

~~~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Part 2: Let’s Go Fishing for Crappie

Fishing for Crappie!

Black vs. White Crappie Habitats

Besides preferring clear water, black crappie hang out in reedy, weedy waters.

Blacks want hard bottoms, while white thrive in silted waters with muddy bottoms.

Sluggish During the Summer

From July to September, you can find crappie in water between 3 and 20 feet.  Your line needs to hit the shallows: weed beds, stumps, any area where branches and brush collect.

They respond to 1.5 to 2.5″ live minnows, jigs, spinners and small crank-baits.

Fall Season

Crappie are still situated between 3 and 20 feet.  During October and November, they tend to hide out under man-made structures (docks), weeds and brushwood.

Try your hand with feathered jigs, curly tails, live bait and bobber rigs. Toss them near rock piles and submerged wood.

Winter Fishing for Crappie

Crappie are still in the 3 – 20 foot water range during the months of December through February.  They may move a bit deeper, so look for them around dropoffs, down deeper in brush piles or under submerged timber.

They will respond to the same bait as in the fall: feathered jigs, curly tails, live bait and bobber rigs.

Spring Fishing

After spring rains or the snow melts, watch for newly submerged land (that is normally dry).  During the months of March and April, crappie don’t hang around the deep end.

They usually stay in waters from 3 to 15 feet. They spend more time in shallow creeks, weed beds, around stumps and logs. At this time, try a variety of lures:  spinners, minnow rigs, jigs and bobber rigs.

General Fishing Info for Crappie

Crappie are at most active during the spring months.  If you plan to fish in the shallows, your rig can be basic:  A bobber is set with 6 to 36″ of line. At the bottom, use a jig, either plain or gussied up with a minnow, etc.

For deeper fishing, you will need: a 1/2 oz. sinker, some #6 to #8 Gold Aberdeen hooks and 2 – 4 lb. test line.  At 12″ and 24″ above the bell sinker, add dropper lines with gold Aberdeen hooks.

Jigs for Crappie

Jigs are the most popular type of artificial bait used today. Jigs are literally a hook with a weight. They are used “as is” or gussied up with live bait or other artificial additions, such as feathers.

Here are some that are particularly good for crappie.

Flipping & Stand-Up Jigs – They are slow to sink and are great for pulling through weed beds.

Arrowhead Jigs - In rocky regions, these are great because they sink quickly.

~~~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Fish Species Tips: Crappie Fishing

What is the Origin of the Name 'Crappie?' Answer at Article's End.

Crappie, like bluegill and bass, are members of the sunfish family.  Crappie have a variety of other names:  papermouths, timber perch, calico bass, speckled bass, strawberry bass and silver bass.

Facts in a Nutshell

The average life span for crappie is 4 to 5 years. At maturity, they are about 8 -10 inches long.  Crappie usually are in the 1 lb. range (although tournament- winners can weigh up to 5 lbs.).

Lakes and streams are their preferred habitats. They usually feed on insects and smaller fish. Oddly enough, they particularly enjoy eating the young of the larger fish that feed on them! This includes northern pike and walleye.*

Crappie and bass are two of the most popular fish that anglers persue. Why? Three reasons: They are plentiful (in the lower 48 states); once hooked, they put up a good fight and they taste g-r-e-a-t!

The Black and White of Crappie

Crappie come in 2 flavors: black and white.  For beginners, it’s not really important to be able to tell them apart.

The quick-and-dirty answer is that, besides being darker than the white, the black crappie have more dorsal spines (fins on top of the fish) than the white.

White crappie are less finicky  about water than blacks.  Black crappies prefer clearer water than whites.

Crappie Trivia

When I first heard the name of this fish, I thought someone was making a comment about the fish (and what he/she  thought of the species).   Since this is such a fun fish to wrangle on the other end of your rod, I couldn’t believe anyone could be so negative.

The name “crappie” (pronounced ‘CROP ee’) comes from the French Canadian phrase “crapet-soleil,” which means “sunfish.”

* This bit of info comes from Wikipedia.

~~~~~

Next time: Let’s Go Crappie Fishing!

~~~

This blog is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Barometric Pressure and Fishing

Atmospheric Pressure Affects Fishing!

Some anglers swear by barometric pressure readings — to foretell changes in the weather.  Simply stated, a falling barometric pressure tells us that there is going to be a major change in the weather — a rain storm, perhaps.

When the barometric pressure is rising, or holding steady, weather conditions will be pleasant.

What Anglers Know

Old time fishermen know that  (generally) fish behavior is affected by barometric pressure.  For example:  Fishing isn’t particularly good while the barometric pressure is falling (This signifies a major weather change).

Anglers like rising barometric pressure because the best fishing occurs during these readings.  Fish seem to be more active during periods of slowly rising barometric pressure.

Another school of though with anglers centers around the steady atmospheric pressure score.  This group doesn’t care if the pressure is falling or rising — just so it remains steady!

Anglers as Weather Forecasters

Does this mean that all fishing enthusiasts should get a degree in meteorology? Of course not. Barometric pressure is only one part of the ‘weather picture.’

We cannot control or manufacture the weather.  Barometric pressure readings, generally, can help us determine whether it is worth our while to hang out our “Gone Fishin’” sign.

Other Weather Conditions

I always thought my grandfather was nuts when he wanted to go fishing while it was raining*.  Marine biologists have proved him right!

Rain and wind knock insects into the water.  Fish that eat insects take advantage of this free food by being more active — just under the water’s surface!

During this time, fish cannot see you as well  – rain droplets break up the water’s surface!

The Hot and Cold of Fishing

Another great time for fishing is just before a cold front blows into an area.  You and the fish will enjoy a cold front that breaks up hot, humid weather.

During the “lazy days of summer,” it takes more to tempt a fish from his cool spot.  This is the time to use a larger bait, lure, whatever.

It is also important to slow down your reeling in of the bait (on your line).  Slow-and-easy is better than jerky-and-fast.  Fish are sluggish in warmer water (in hot, humid conditions).

~~~

* I’m not referring to a storm with lightening or thunder. Fishing during a serious storm is foolhardy because lightening can strike you, your boat, your rod, etc. I’m sure you get the picture.

~~~~~

Articles Coming Soon:

• Sample Log for Your Catches
  
• Make Your Own ‘Fish Attractor’
  
• Fish Species Tips for Crappie
  
• Fishing for Something New? Try Northern Pike!

~~~

This weblog is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Part 2: How & Why Do I Use a Duck Carcass?

Originally, I wrote this just after the holidays, when folks were wondering how they could use left-over bird or fowl carcasses. This particular post still gets lots of hits, even in the heat of summer.

While thinking about this, I remembered another way to cook — with even more benefit to diners!   I added it to the end of this article!

For Chicken, Hen, Duck, Goose, Turkey - Domestic or Wild!

~*~   ~*~   ~*~

What’s So Great About a Fowl Carcass?

There are three basic reasons I would boil a poultry carcass:

1) The comparison between a quart of  chicken/fowl stock versus a quart of water and bouillon versus purchased chicken/fowl stock is non-existent. They aren’t even in the same zip code! Stock that has been simmered has so much more flavor and nutrients!

2) In these tough economic times, it doesn’t make sense to toss the carcass without deriving its goodness for your table.

3) Scientists have proved that the “old wive’s tale” of giving chicken soup to an invalid is NOT an old wive’s tale.

There is scientific proof that the nutrients leached from the carcass during cooking are needed by the body to help it recover – from whatever ails them! The nutrients derived in this way are easier for the elderly to assimilate into their bodies.

All This Sounds Like a Lot of Trouble

Put the fowl carcass into a slow cooker (you may need to snap the bones, to fit it into the cooker), add 3 or 4 cups water, add some onion, 1 tsp. sea salt, garlic (Got celery and carrots? Add them), and turn it on (low or high)  as you go to bed.

How much trouble is that? In the morning, take the liner out of the cooker, let it cool and put it into the refrigerator (with the lid on) just before you leave.

In the evening, you can skim off the fat (or not, your choice) and pour the juice (strain out the veggies and carcass – discard them) into containers and freeze. If there are tidbits of the meat left from the bones, I add it to the broth.

Now What?

Soup, stew, gravy — whatever you make from this stock will be 100% more valuable to your body than the purchased, the bullion or the plain water.

I can think of dozens of uses for this stock. Save it for colds season and make soup. Use it as a base for black bean soup (or any other dried beans/legumes).

Use it as the base for a chicken stew (toss into a slow cooker:  onions, carrots, potatoes, garlic, celery, leftover chicken, whatever you have). Let it cook for 6 to 8 hours, adjust seasonings, enjoy!

Finally

Our forefathers and fore mothers never wasted anything. Creating their own fish or chicken or beef stock was one of the ways they stayed healthy.

BTW, I always add a teaspoon of sea salt to any stock I’m creating from a carcass. Salt helps leach more nutrients out of the bones.

Do I use quail or doves for this? No, they are too small.

~*~   ~*~   ~*~

Cooking a Carcass #2

Not everyone has a slow cooker/crock pot. If you have a large cast iron pot (with lid), such as a “dutch oven,” this is a great way to use it.

Use the same recipe as above, except cover the carcass with water.  Bring to a boil and allow to simmer for 1 or 2 hours.  Then use the broth as indicated above.

During cooking, liquids slowly leach iron from the cast iron into the broth!   This is a great way to add iron to the diet.  In fact, acidic foods leach iron faster (think: tomatoes, vinegar, etc.).

Iron is critical to the manufacture of red blood cells. Up to 30% of Americans do not get enough iron.  This is a safe, cheap way to add to your family’s health!

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Fish Senses & How They Use Them – Part 2

Fish have four senses – sight, smell, hearing and feeling vibrations!

What Can Fish See?

Biologists have proved that fish can see 4 colors: red, blue, yellow and green.   Their ability to see clearly is determined by certain factors:  Is the water clear or muddy?   How deep are the objects/colors?

Most of the light rays shining down into the water are lost by the depth of 25 feet.  Thus, below 25 feet, most objects appear dark or black to fish.

At any depth, however, fish have learned to recognize the shapes of things that are important to them — say — anything in their food chain!

Fish & Their Sense of Smell

Fish can smell you coming; they can smell odors hundreds of yards away. Another way of looking at this: they can smell an odor that is only one part in 80 million parts of water!

There are certain odors that drive fish away: gasoline, nicotine, oils, human scent, etc. Thus, it is important to wear a ‘good scent’ or use fish soap that covers your scent.

Some fish use their sense of smell more than others. For example, predator fish (bass, muskie, pike, and others) rely on their sense of sight when searching for food.

However, the scavenger class of fishes (lake trout, carp catfish, etc.) rely more on their sense of smell to forage for a meal.

Fish & Their Sense of Hearing

Fish do not have external ears like we do; however, their sense of  hearing extends thousands of feet!  Their hearing is located in the bones of their skull.

Good Vibrations & Fish

Note the lateral line on the drawing of the fish above.  These are sensory cells that run the length of the fish’s body on both sides.

Amazingly, these cells process low-frequency vibrations. In other words, these cells serve a hearing function that is much more sensitive than ours!

They can feel vibrations and/or hear sounds that occur in the water (up to ~ 100 feet away).

What Does This Mean?

Fish can hear sounds/vibrations caused by anglers walking near water!  They can also detect a boat on the water through its vibrations.

The only good news about this is — fish cannot hear the sound vibrations carried by airwaves, that do not pass into the ground or the water.

Thus, fish don’t hear quiet talking above the water, but they are “tuned in” to noise and movement in a boat.

~~~~~

This blog is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Which one is Best – a Fixed-Blade or a Folding Knife? (Knives #5)

Fixed Blade for Strength!

Folding and fixed blade knives each have unique capabilities and weaknesses. Only you can decide which best fits your situation. Let’s look at the pros and cons of each.

The first consideration is: What do you want/need this knife to do? How will it be used? Once this is clear in your mind, it is easier to evaluate the knives available.

Fixed Knife: Pros and Cons

The advantages of these knives are clear: They can be made in very large sizes, their design is simple – yet they are known for their potential strength. Because the blade is all one piece, from handle to blade tip, there are no moving parts and the knife is sturdy and long-lasting. They are also easy to keep clean.

Generally speaking, a fixed blade is twice the length of a folder (folded blade knife). Most fixed blade knives are sheathed (covered), for safety. Some fixed blades now come with an interchangeable blade!

In many cities, states and countries, fixed blades are banned (with or without a sheath). In certain locales, mores dictate that fixed blades are “socially unacceptable” (Only farm workers are exempted from this ban)!

Folding Knives: Pros and Cons

Folders are more discrete, the blade folds into the handle when not in use. Most of these tools are known as “pocket knives” – indicating their mode of transport. Urbanites prefer these; the general population is unaware that ‘you’re carrying.’

Folders must be well-constructed to be as tough as fixed blades. The most vulnerable parts of any folder  are – the blade pivot (axis pin) and the lock spring. Quality tells here; this is where most folding knives fail.

The lock spring must keep the knife in an an open position, as long as you need it, and then release the blade to return into its holder. The longer bladed knives are more likely to have a problem – there’s more leverage on the axis pin, especially if using the flat side of the blade.

Thus, there’s a limit to the length of a blade. The longer the blade, the longer the handle must be to accommodate it.

Folding Knife = Convenience!

One other problem, rarely mentioned: Pocket knives are a bit harder to clean. Fur, wood slivers, whatever are more likely to gather inside the handle and need to be removed.

Back to Our Question

Fixed blades are long-lasting, easy to clean, tough and strong. Folding blades are convenient, discrete and versatile.

You will probably finish your shopping expedition with one of each – one for the big jobs (fixed) and another in your pocket – for 1001 little jobs each day!

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This is # 5 in a series:

Why Can’t Guys Just Have One Knife for Everything?: Part 1**

Why Are Knives Made of Such Weird Sounding Stuff? (Knives – Part 2)

What do You Know About Knife Blades & the Rockwell Scale?** (Knives – Part 3)

Why are There So Many Blade Shapes? (Knives – Part 4)

More are planned!

Also See: The 10 Commandments of Knife Care & Maintenance

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This blog is a companion to my website, EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Why are There So Many Blade Shapes? (Knives #4)

This series will be offered from-time-to-time, as the mood strikes me.

–marylouise

~~~Why are There So Many Blade Shapes?~~~

Well, the one sentence answer to this is: There are different blade shapes because of all the jobs knives are called upon to do. Some blade shapes are suitable for a number of tasks while others are the best for a single job.

The Clip Point Knife

The Most Famous Clip Point!

The Bowie Knife is the most famous of the clip point knives.  Even though it is a very old design, it is still one of the most popular blades for just about anything done outdoors.  Only one side of the blade is sharpened and it can be called the ‘belly’.  On the upper side (spine) of the knife, a portion is ‘clipped’ from the blade.

Generally, the part that is removed causes the tip to be slightly lower than the spine.  This gives more control of the blade when using it to skin an animal or when using the point. Although the photo shows an upper edge that looks as sharp as the lower one, it is probably a ’swedge’ – the upper edge is beveled but not sharpened.

Gut Hook Blade

Gut Hook Knife

This is definitely a specialty knife — this unusual-shaped skinner helps any hunter field dress large game with ease.

Like the Bowie, the blade is a modified drop point (minor curving of blade, so the tip drops a little to meet the sharpened edge – very popular). The kicker is the sharpened “U” or “V.”

The beauty (a term I use loosely in relation to this knife) of this knife is that, after making an incision in a carcass, the blade is pulled backwards (along the spine of the knife) under the skin.  You are literally unzipping the skin from the meat and entrails.

This is an incredibly useful tool, even if it is one of the ugliest knives I’ve ever seen!

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Coming Attractions

Well, that’s all for today. Next time, I’ll either cover:

• the Tanto Knife (and another  blade), or
• Pros and Cons of Fixed and Folding Blades, or
• Maintenance Rules for Knives, or
• What to do When You Can’t Sharpen Your Old Knife Any More

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This is # 4 in a series:

Why Can’t Guys Just Have One Knife for Everything?: Part 1**

Why Are Knives Made of Such Weird Sounding Stuff? (Knives – Part 2)

What do You Know About Knife Blades & the Rockwell Scale?** (Knives – Part 3)

Why are There So Many Blade Shapes? (Knives – Part 4)

More are planned!

Also See: The 10 Commandments of Knife Care & Maintenance

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A Reminder: I sell Gerber knives and Leatherman tools. This series is not “selling” anything; it is strictly informational.

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Please note: Get my news hot off the stove with your FREE sign-up – (1) Subscription button for feeds for my postings (top of right column) and (2) Subscription link to get my postings via email (Click area is near “Top Posts”).

Please join me!

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This blog is a companion to my website, EasyOnlineOrdering.com

10 Reasons I Know I’m Married to a Hunter

"A Hunting He Will Go...."

1) MDH* is constantly honing his skills – “talking” to ducks, turkeys and deer – with his callers!  The kids have learned to “quack” their needs – for a quicker response from their father. I think our family is turning into a bunch of cracked quackers!

2) Whenever I want to go on vacation, MDH reminds me we need to wait until  ”__whatever__ season is over.” He neglects to mention that something is always “in season.”

3) In order to get the grass cut, I use “hunting” psychology. “Why don’t you go hunt up your lawnmower and stalk the deer grass?  Be sure you take your knife, to field dress any varmints or game you might find.  When you get back, we’ll have some venison stew.”  When he’s going through ‘hunting withdrawal,’ this works well!

4) He couldn’t care less what he wears to work. However, tell him his hunting threads aren’t ready and watch him howl!

I don’t have the courage to tell him I accidently washed his new camo hunting jacket in regular soap (thus delivering a deadly dose of UV Brightener to that garment).  I’m probably safe until a deer calls, “You hoooooo, Richard, I SEE you.”

5) My husband issues a  monthly calendar with all his hunting activities “pre-marked for our convenience.”

6) Jake, my husband’s Labrador Retriever, lives a life of leisure and ease. MDH worries more over Jake’s health than that of his own kids.  His point: “Jake is a better retriever than the kids.”

7) MDH can carry on a 15 minute conversation about great hunting spots — with a wrong number!

By way of letting me in on “the thrill of hunting,” MDH allows me to carry his deer parts to the deer processor. Talk about excitement! And if I’m really “good,” he lets me pick up the packaged meat a few weeks later.  (This is what I dreamed of as a child; picking up and delivering deer carcasses in heavy Igloo’s.)

9) A “little hunting trip” requires an F350 truck and a goose-neck trailer.

10) Our resident hunter loves Halloween; our kids hate it!  Richard makes them dress up as “duck decoys.” He says it helps get him revved up for the season!

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Do any of these sound familiar? Welcome to the “Hapless Homebodies” Club!  We have levels of membership: “Fall Deer Hunting  Widows,” “Widows of Bird-Brained Husbands Who Hunt” and  ”Widows of Husbands Who Hunt Year Round.”

There’s considerable support for organizing a group ‘hunting trip’ to “Le Bare*  in Houston. The feeling is that these guys could help devert a widow’s mind from her (temporary) grief.

*Le Bare is a ‘gentlewoman’s club’ with incredibly muscled male dancers. They did not get those muscles packing a deer out of a glen!)

* MDH = My Deer Husband. Also known as: “He who likes to be obeyed … but rarely is.”

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

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Do you “tweet”? For the latest, when it is published, follow my twitter reports @ http://twitter.com/marylouise22.com Click on “Home” and it will take you to my latest tweets!

Should I Shoot a Spike While Hunting White-tailed Deer? **(Part 1)

Whitetailed Deer

MDH* brought  this fascinating article to my attention today. Unfortunately, it is several thousand words long.  I would call it a “white paper” from the Texas Parks & Wildlife Division.(1) They did their research at  Texas A & M University’s Kerr Wildlife Management Area. Why this is significant is that this facility has over 20 generations of deer.

Cut to the Chase

For those folks who read the last page of a mystery before starting the book, here’s the answer: “Yes, by harvesting spikes early-on, it improves the antler quality of the remaining herd.” However, the story of why this is true is what is so interesting.

What is a ‘Spike?’

So that everyone is on the same page, let’s define a ’spike.’ Texas Parks sees it as “any deer at least a year old that has two hardened antlers that do not branch or fork.” They are NOT referring to young fawns with “skin covered knobs” called a “nubbin buck.”

They go on to say that, “Buck fawns occasionally have a protrusion of chalky white bone tissue through the skin up to 1/2 inch long, but this is rare and we don’t call them spikes.”

What Hunters Think

There’s controversy about this subject. Many hunters don’t want to kill spikes because they think that poor nutrition is the reason a year-old has no rack. (In other words, their suggestion is – to paraphrase an angler – ‘Throw ‘em back and let ‘em grow up a bit.”)

Another idea is to shoot older spikes, because genetically, they’ve proved that they are not capable of developing antlers. Their reasoning continues: ‘Save the young spikes, poor nutrition is the reason youngsters didn’t produce a rack this year.’

Texas Park’s Advice on Spikes

This is a direct quote: “If two spikes walk out in front of you in a 2-buck county, shoot the smallest one first and don’t let the second get away.” I was so surprised, I had to read this three times!

Before I go into the “Ten Commandments of Texas Parks Regarding Spikes (my words, not theirs),” let me assure my ambivalent readers that studies in Louisiana have confirmed these findings. Therefore, either the deer in two states are crazy or these findings can be replicated across America — or at least the South.

A Little Thing Called, “Genetic Potential”

(1) “Antler development is genetically based. Not all deer have the same genetic potential.” (conclusions drawn by Texas Parks & Wildlife biologists) Nutrition AND ‘genetic potential’ are necessary for antler development. If either one of these elements is missing, antlers don’t grow. They proved this by allowing spikes to breed with does in pens. There was nutritious food, vitamins, water, etc., yet a high percentage of the offspring were spikes!

Finally

Come back soon for another exciting installment of  ”Managing Spikes for Fun and Profit.” We’ll be dishing up Commandments #2 thru 7, next time!

In the meantime, have a great weekend!

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(1) The report I’m referring to is available online, as a pdf document at: http://www.tpwd.state.tx.us/publications/pwdpubs/media/pwd_lf_w7000_0247.pdf (It is 6 pages long.)

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* MDH = My Deer Husband, Richard

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This Series —

Part 1: Should I Shoot a Spike While Hunting White-Tailed Deer? (intro & item #1)

Part 2:  Why Don’t We Just Let That Little Spike Grow Up?  (items #2 thru #7)

Part 3:  What About Spikes While White-tail Deer Hunting?  (Commandments 8 thru 10, conclusions)

Part 4: “Sure, this Spike is Better Lookin’ than Any Ol’ 16 Point Deer! Sure.” (Conclusions)

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This blog is part of my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Why Don’t We Just Let That Little Spike Grow Up? (Part 2)

Whitetailed Deer in Spring

{This is a continuation of (what I call): “The 10 Commandments of Spike Management” from the Texas Parks & Wildlife Dept. Please note: The intro and Commandment #1 are in Part 1.  These are their conclusions about ’spike management’ – after considerable study.}

(2) “Nutrition does affect antler growth.” So, no matter what the deer’s ‘genetic potential,’ if there isn’t sufficient nutrition for the deer, antler growth will be affected.

(3) “Early or late birth does not affect antler development if deer receive adequate nutrition.” Essentially, a spike is a spike.  Earlier birthing did not turn a spike into an antlered deer. The only relation between the lateness of birth and antler production seems to be: If the deer is born late in the season, it may be nutritionally deprived because there is less forage. What nutrition is available is diverted to maintain and grow muscles — not antlers.

(4) “The majority of yearling spike bucks will produce smaller antlers and fewer points in following years than will fork-antlered deer.” Basically, they have proven that “what you see is what you’re gunna’ get.” Spikes seem to be a genetic trait that doesn’t improve over the years.

(5) “You can improve a herd by selectively removing inferior antlered deer and allowing the deer with good antlers to breed.” They asked the question: Could they remove the spikes and let the antlered deer reproduce? What would be the result?

By selectively reproducing with more-desirable traited (antlered) deer, something called “heritability” comes into play. The more desirable a trait is – the less likely there will be improvement. Obviously, fully-antlered deer are highly desirable – therefore, removing the spikes will not cause all of the new deer to have antlers. Production of antlers traits are passed from one generation to another, however.

(6) “Does provide half of the genetic potential for antler development.” Since scientists don’t know if a doe carries genes for antlers or spikes, they cannot “select-out” deer with spike genes.

(7) “Average yearling bucks on good range should have six points.” According to their research, with good nutrition, most bucks attain this desirable point. Even poor habitats produce antlered deer. By killing spikes, it allows the antlered deer to reproduce. However, most hunters prefer to haul home deer ‘with racks.’

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This Series:

Part 1: Should I Shoot a Spike While Hunting White-Tailed Deer? (intro & item #1)

Part 2:  Why Don’t We Just Let That Little Spike Grow Up?  (items #2 thru #7)

Part 3:  What About Spikes While White-tail Deer Hunting?  (Commandments 8 thru 10, conclusions)

Part 4: “This Spike is Better Lookin’ than Any Ol’ 16 Point Deer! Sure it is.” (Conclusions)

What About Those Spikes While Whitetail Deer Hunting? (Part 3)

Whitetailed Deer

Just a reminder: This is third in a series of postings about hunting spikes while whitetail deer hunting. The conclusions highlighted in orange are from the Texas Parks & Wildlife.

Texas A&M University’s Kerr Deer Management Facility was part of this study. The facility has deer from 20 generations, to watch the effects of variables on the evolution of the herd.  These same results were repeated in a Louisiana university study.

The first two parts of this series were written on previous pages of this blog.

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(8) “Even when most bucks are spikes, removing them will not endanger the breeding potential.” Texas Parks and Wildlife researchers have proven that massive removal of spikes does not affect deer production. They’ve shown that a single buck can breed with as many as 40 does in a season.

(9) “Antler development improves with age up to a point.” Amazingly, you can expect antler production to improve until about the age of 6 1/2. After that time, the deer’s teeth deteriorate and older deer don’t intake sufficient nutrition (even in nutrition-rich climes) to develop large racks.

The deer with the best – most dense – antlers are usually between 4 1/2 – 6 1/2 years old.

(10) The best time to manage for genetic improvement is during periods of nutritional stress.  With less food available, it is important to feed breeding deer first – and best. Watch for young antlered bucks and make them your future breeding stock.

~~~What Does This Mean to the Hunter & Landowner?~~~

Harvesting spikes is good for herd development. In fact, they state clearly: “Consistently removing spikes from the herd will eventually improve the antler quality if the range is in good condition.”

A balance must be maintained between numbers of deer and food available. The best way to do that is through harvesting. By selecting young deer with poor antlers, you are allowing  deer with more genetically desirable traits (full antlers) to become the breeding stock.

An Interesting Aside -

According to Texas Parks statistics, hunters snag over 60% of the yearling bucks each year. Of those, about 60% are ‘fork-antlered deer.’

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Come back for the “Conclusion of the Conclusions.” If Texas Parks & Wildlife’s recommendations had any teeth (were law) there would be a howl of protest from hunters.

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This Series:

Part 1: Should I Shoot a Spike While Hunting White-Tailed Deer? (intro & item #1)

Part 2:  Why Don’t We Just Let That Little Spike Grow Up?  (items #2 thru #7)

Part 3:  What About Spikes While White-tail Deer Hunting?  (Commandments 8 thru 10, Conclusions)

Part 4: “This Spike is Better Lookin’ than Any Ol’ 16 Point Deer! Sure it is….” (Concluding the Conclusions)

# 4: “This Spike is Better Lookin’ than Any Ol’ 6 Point Deer! (Sure it is.)”

Generally: No Rack = No Want!

This is the final entry in a series: Shooting spikes while hunting whitetail deer. The ideas/conclusions highlighted in orange are from the Texas Parks & Wildlife.

What’s Most Important – Nutrition, Genetics or Age?

This is like asking which is more important: the digestive, circulatory or respiratory system? All three are critical to the life of a human. Life cannot be maintained without any one of these processes.

Deer need good genetics, good nutrition and to be of sufficient age to reach their potential. Since ‘a spike is a spike,’ he isn’t going to turn into a 16 point deer with good nutrition and age.

Texas Parks uses a term – “improper harvest.’ In this category, they include “over-harvest of older age class males.”  By making yearling spikes the main goal of a hunter’s aim, it takes pressure off of the older, fully-antlered bucks.

Texas Parks maintains that “by shifting hunting pressure to the bottom segment of the herd, age as well as antler quality can be improved.”

Where the Does Fit in this Plan

Unfortunately, does do not have “I carry spike genes” or “I carry antlered genes” stamped on their foreheads. Besides targeting spike yearlings, Texas P&W suggests, older does should be removed from the gene pool.

By removing these mature does, the balance between food availability and herd size would be stabilized. With more nutrition, there would be fewer fawns – with greater chance of survival.

Deer Management = Quality Deer

Males, because they mate with many does, have more influence on the gentetics of a herd. By removing the young spikes, potentially, more antlered deer join the gene pool. Since the older does (more likely to carry ’spike genes’) are removed, eventually, the herd will have more antlered deer.

Final Word

Every hunter’s group will have someone tell about the ‘Spike that Grew a Huge Rack.’  They do happen; however, it can take years, and he still carries the spike genes.

Texas P&W says that hunters, by targeting antlered deer, are inadvertently creating more spikes. Why? If the spikes are allowed to grow, they – not the fork-antlered deer – are the breeding stock.  ”If you protect fork-antlered yearlings from harvest long enough to allow them to mature, you can improve antler quality in the herd….”

If Texas P&W had their way (laws), I think there would be howls of protest from hunters in Texas. MDH* opines “it ain’t gunna’ happen.”

What do you think? If your state made these rules binding in your state (for x number of years), how would you feel about it?

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This is the companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

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Part 1: Should I Shoot a Spike While Hunting White-Tailed Deer? (intro & item #1)

Part 2:  Why Don’t We Just Let That Little Spike Grow Up?  (items #2 thru #7)

Part 3:  What About Spikes While White-tail Deer Hunting?  (Commandments 8 thru 10, conclusions)

Part 4: “This Spike is Better Lookin’ than Any Ol’ 6 Point Deer! (Sure it is.)” (Conclusions)

The 10 Commandments of Knife Use & Maintenance**

Golden Rules for Knives

This topic is serious, the way I state it is not. I hope no one is offended.

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And the Lord gave unto Abraham 10 Mighty Rules of Knives.

(First) “Thou shalt not let thy blade go dull.” A dull blade is a dangerous blade. It takes more pressure to use a dull blade, and accidents often happen when your hand slips or you lose control of the blade.

(2nd) “Thou shalt not hand thy knife to another – blade first.” If it is a folding knife, pass it on in a folded position. Hold a fixed blade by it’s spine (top, unsharpened edge) with the blade away from you, allowing the receiver to take the knife by its handle.

(3rd) “Thou shalt not use a knife’s weakest point (the tip) as a pry-bar.” Buy a small ‘chisel point rescue’ for daily use, and keep your knife intact.

(4th) “Thou shalt take thy time to sharpen thy knife blade.”  Use the sharpening system as instructed by the directions that came with it. More knife blades are damaged by poor honing than use!

(5th) “Thou shalt keep thy knife as clean as thyself.”  Most of the time, knives traspass where our hands don’t want to go – acids, oils, dirt, etc. Three things that knives come most into contact with are – salt, blood and sweat. They are corrosive and damaging to the blade.

Wash a knife in mild soap, rinse and dry with a soft cloth. Always wash blades before food preparation. To avoid contamination with bacteria, knives should be washed after working with meat, and before using it on other foods.

(6th) “Thou shalt not leave thy knife in water or exposed to heat/sunlight for long periods of time.” As water is the universal solvent, it can unglue the handle, or other parts. Excessive heat can warp the knife.

(7th)  ”Thou shalt not throw thy knife – even in fun.” More knife tips are broken by careless handling than  people can imagine. If you are playing a knife throwing game, get one specifically for it – don’t take a chance on your prized knife(s).

(8th) “Thou shalt not oil thy leather sheath.” The oil discolors the leather and sometimes causes thread failure. Best practices: saddle soap for cleaning and dubbing (a water-resistant shoe wax) to protect your investment.

(9th) “Thou shalt protect thy blades during temporary storage.”  Use a light touch when adding a coat of wax to the blade. High carbon blades may need a bit more – a thin layer of petroleum jelly before storage.

(10) “Thou shalt be tender in preparing thy knives for long-term storage.” Knives and sheaths should be placed in plastic bags separately. Use a vapor-protector (desiccant – think little bags placed in shoe boxes to protect leather) in the bag.

And Abraham took these Golden Rules for Knives down to the multitudes. And all was good.

MDH,* who advises God regularly has an 11th – Thou shalt not use metal on metal (don’t cut meat in the frying pan – use a cutting board). This one isn’t nearly as catchy as the first 10. But ‘He who wants to be obeyed – and rarely is’ asked me to add this one. (If you read Rumpole, you understand the allusion).

** This posting was inspired by: Knives: An Illustrated Encyclopedia of Knives for Fighting, Hunting and Survival. Pat Farey; 2003; $24.95)

See you soon!

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Good Grief! A 30 Point Deer! Shot with a Handmade Long Bow!

While trolling thru some of my favorite forums, I found this.  Prairie State Outdoors forums are active and interesting.

Shot with a Handmade Long Bow!

“This buck was taken by a 14 year old Amish boy near Dalton WI. He used a hand-made long bow and made the killing shot by stalking the huge buck using corn shocks for cover. The boy’s family would not allow him to pose with the trophy animal for pictures so a nearby neighbor, Willie Flacid posed and is also acting as spokesman for the Amish boy.

According to Flacid, the Amish family has already received several offers from outdoor sporting companies to purchase the trophy. No dollar amount has been announced yet, but according to Flacid, ‘the amount of money being offered is enough that no one would ever be hard up again.’

Bresquire (The person who posted the photo and story)

Here’s the URL – http://www.prairiestateoutdoors.com/index.php?/forums/viewthread/430/

Further down the page, this was added: “That buck came from adams county, ohio. i just happen to live there so i know for sure. 36 scoreable points. that deer has brought alot of hunters in from all over.”

Round 3: CDC Weighs in on Lead-Poison-in-Deer Issue

Round 1

Watchful Whitetail

The Minnesota Dept. of Natural Resources (DNR) issued a study citing their concern that hunting bullets (containing lead) break up inside a deer and pose a lead poisoning risk in humans eating the venison.

Although they labeled the report as “preliminary,” they were quick to spread the word. This reaction came from finding some lead in packaged game – donated to food banks in North Dakota, Minnesota and a few other mid-western states.

On the basis of this report, some states collected all of the donated venison and had it destroyed.  (Many hunters have the deer they shoot processed/packaged and donate the meat to foodbanks across America.)

Round 2

The National Shooting Sports Foundation (NSSF) – the trade association for the firearms, hunting and recreational shooting industry – released a long report that said, essentially -”there is no credible, peer-reviewed scientific evidence that using traditional hunting ammunition creates a human health risk.”

As part of their report they highlighted the state of Iowa, which has been randomly testing children (500,000+) and adults (25,000+) for lead contamination for 15 years. They did not toss the food because they could find no connection between lead ammunition used and heightened lead contamination in humans.

NSSF also indicated that CDC (Centers for Disease & Prevention) was conducting tests regarding this issue.

Round 3

The CDC did not find a connection between ammunition used and lead contamination in humans. The short summary is in a box on this page – http://www.nssf.org/news/PR_idx.cfm?PRloc=share/PR/&PR=110708.cfm&CFID=3197794&CFTOKEN=9bbbf4263d2b5d79-F4AECCFA-0A2C-208F-D227DDCAC8E9983F&jsessionid=f03087e0b5d1f57e886c7f4e334d626b4155 You can read the full 31 page report: http://www.nssf.org/share/PDF/ND_report.pdf

Now the Story Gets Interesting

“The baseless claim that caused concern about consuming venison harvested with lead ammunition was born out of the anti-hunting movement. The story started when a dermatologist with ties to the Peregrine Fund–an organization dedicated to eliminating the use of lead ammunition for hunting–claimed to have collected packages of venison from food banks that contained lead fragments.

Out of fear and an overabundance of caution, health officials (who never conducted their own study) accepted the dermatologist’s findings and ordered all food banks to discard their venison.” (from the report issued by FSSN: “Firearms Industry Statement on Results of CDC Blood Lead Levels in Hunter’s Study”).

It turns out that the dermatologist is a board member of the Peregrine Fund, not “the independent actions of a concerned hunter, as he claimed.” According to FSSN, this group is dedicated to more than taking the lead out of ammo. They are an anti-hunting group trying to ban hunting.

My Interpretation

I don’t know anything about this group. From a quick reading on Google, they seem to be a group of tree huggers and savers of birds. I’m not into conspiracy theories or worries that everyone is trying to kill the sport of hunting. If the statements about the dermatologist are true (his ties to Peregrine and their mission), I’m angry.

The dermatologist has a license to practice medicine, not his moral agenda. Look at the waste of food and the money spent testing!

When do we start to make people responsible for their actions when they are knowingly dishonest? He used his status as a physician to cry, “Wolf.” Why isn’t he liable for his actions?

He isn’t the only miscreant in this fiasco. Have the state agencies that simply took the word of a single doctor – did no testing of their own – cleaned house yet?  If not, why not?

Knives #6: the Tanto, Drop Point & Sheepsfoot Blades

This is a series on knife blade types that appears occasionally. Today, the Tanto, Drop Point and Sheepsfoot Blades  are up for discussion.

Tanto Blade

The Tanto is based on an old Japanese Samurai design. It has a shallow grind on both sides of the single edge.  The American Tanto is fairly angular and has a chisel grind on one side of the edge.

Generally, the edge is parallel to the spine until it sharply angles about 45 degrees to a point.

Example of Tanto Blade

That leaves the point thick and incredibly strong.  This makes for great control in piercing and penetration.

It doesn’t hurt that the design LOOKS lethal and is very marketable because of its tactical persona. The military uses this design for some applications, bolstering its ‘Rambo’ looks.

Originally, the tanto was created to pierce armor. The main negative of this style of knife is that the cutting edge is secondary to the powerful thrust of the knife point.

Drop Point Blade

Example of Drop Point Knife

Most of MDH’s knives are drop points. It is one of the most popular styles because it does so many things well.

A shallow, convex curve lowers the point of the knife from the unsharpened spine. The deep belly, which  takes and keeps a sharp edge, rises up to meet the point. This increases tip strength.

The lowered point provides more control over the blade. This style is at home doing fine skinning, field dressing wild game, slicing  and even jointing.

Sheepsfoot Blade

Modified Sheepsfoot Blade

Slicing is the forte of the sheepsfoot blade. It is considered to be a better slicer than a clip point (Bowie knife).

This knife got its name from its likeness to the hoof of a sheep (Go figure).  The point is rounded and the blade is fairly straight. This specialized tool seems to slice best on a flat cutting area.

In recent years, this blade has become a favorite of first responders and emergency personnel.  The beauty of this folding knife is that it can be used to slice away a seat belt, without harming the injured.

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Join us again, to wander through the amazing facts of knives – slicing and dicing our way to new knowledge.

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

What’s On Tap for the Next Few Days

We Have So Much to be Thankful For!

Just want to tell you what’s on its way:

Tuesday: Which One is Best – a Fixed-Blade or a Folding Knife? (Knives #5)

Wednesday: What About Spikes While Whitetail Deer Hunting? (Part 3)

Thursday: I’m not going to try to compete with Turkey and Football! No Posting.

Friday: “This Spike is Better Lookin’ than Any Ol’ 16 Point Deer! (Sure it is.)” the final part of the spike story.

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If you have been following the brouhaha about the “lead in venison” issue, we’re now into Round 3. The CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) has gotten involved with extensive testing. A report is coming up next week!

Have a great holiday – and remember – GOBBLE TILL YOU WOBBLE!

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Gobble till ya' Wobble!

Please join me!

~~~

~~~Giving Thanks~~~

Gobble till You Wobble!

Thanks to all my readers (Mom, you may be the only one – but you’re the most important one!)

Thanks to my zany friends who share material that tickles their funny-bones and hope the material works on me too!

Thanks to my chow chow, Wendy, who – at 10 – is starting to slow down. Her graying muzzle reminds me of our passing years.

Thanks to “whomever” who sent one of my postings to AlphaInventions.com. Their readership is phenomenal and really caused my stats to jump.

Thanks to MDH, who is the inspiration for most of these blog postings. Now, Richard races (marathons, ultra-marathons) as much as he hunts. However, he still gets 3 weeks of South Texas hunting each year.

Thanks also to Jake and Pork-Chop, our lab and basset hound. They have made it their life’s ambition to make sure I get enough exercise. Unfortunately, the exercise they want is from my computer to the back door – to let them out-and-in.

Thanks also to our adult children who don’t seem to mind when I tell them I’ll call them back as soon as I ‘finish this blog.’ Sometimes, that takes 2 or 3 days!

Take care and best wishes!

Marylouise

What Do I Do With a New Gift I Got – Called a ‘Multi-tool?’ (1 of 2)

Locking Pliers!

A Note to my Readers: I sell Gerber knives and Leatherman multi-tools on my website. This article is strictly informational – I am not selling anything. That’s no exactly true – I’m trying to sell you on the idea of coming back tomorrow for the next post!

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In the next few weeks, you may be voicing this same question. Since we are in the gift-giving season, this is an explanation of the ‘what’ and ‘why’ of Multi-tools. The multi-tool (from here, I’ll refer to it as an MT) is a reincarnation of the Swiss Army Knife.  A standard since 1886, the Swiss issued these knives to their soldiers – as a rifle accessory.

The main difference is that the base of this newer tool is a pair of pliers, not a pocket knife. MT’s are wildly popular. When having your toolbox of regular implements isn’t possible, an MT will work well in an emergency or for spur-of-the-moment repairs.

The ‘Nuts & Bolts’ of an MT

No one is going to tell you an MT screwdriver is as good as a standard tool – but it is a valuable substitute. Definitely, you get what you pay for with this tool. That inexpensive MT may look snappy in your hand, but when it fails in a tight spot, you will realize your mistake.

What to Look For in an MT

Purchasing an MT calls for: “Think twice, buy once.” What are the tasks you’re most likely to do with this implement? Make a list. Then put a star by the most important need.

‘Having a set of pliers’ should be high on your list since all MT’s are based on pliers. There are so many configurations and models, you could give everyone in your extended family a unique model. I can see the thrill on your wife’s or girl friend’s face now!

The Problem with Great Looks

I find that people ‘fall in love’ with one MT’s looks and try to fit that tool into the one they need. Ahem …  that’s a bit backward.

A hunter has very different needs from a handyman.  Spend some time looking at each tool. Can you use the scissors easily?  Do you have a good grip on the tool? Is it comfortable in your hand?

Finally

Next time, I’ll share Pat Farey’s list of the most valuable implements. He is author of Knives: An Illustrated Encyclopedia of Knives for Fighting, Hunting and Survival (2003, $24.95; ISBN = 1592281087)

Tell Me About a Gift I Want – Called a ‘Multi-tool’ (2 of 2)

Innovative Design for Multi-Tool

Pat Farey is the author of Knives: An Illustrated Encyclopedia of Knives for Fighting, Hunting and Survival (2003, $24.95; ISBN = 1592281087). I like his straight-from-the-hip evaluations.

Here’s his list of optimal implements in a multi-tool: (page 80, rearranged for ease of reading)

• Snipe-nosed pliers with wire cutter and stripper,
• Clip or spear point plain cutting blade,
• Sheep’s foot serrated cutting blade,
• A wood saw,
• Scissors,
• Large, medium, small flathead screwdrivers,
• Small, cross-head screwdriver,
• A good quality medium and fine file,
• An awl,
• A can opener,
• A lanyard hole and/or a strong split ring,
• And a weather-resistant belt pouch.

Mr. Farey opines that a ‘first responder’ would want a heavy-duty tool with lots of tools, while an office worker might need a lighter multi-tool with a better pair of scissors.

Things to Check

After determining the main job of your multi-tool, you need to “feel” the tool. If it seems clumsy or uncomfortable in your hand, keep looking.

Make extra sure the handle remains stable/rigid while using it. Nothing is worse than not being able to replace the tools because the handle housing moved!

Is this tool ‘lockable?’  If you cannot lock it, even manually, you will live to regret your choice.  Look carefully at the rivets that hold the individual tools together. Cheap rivets don’t grow into solid rivets.

If you need one-handed opening pliers, make sure your model has this option.

New Technology = New Options

Technology has improved and many tools can be extracted from the plier part without opening said pliers.

The pliers-based multi-tools have proven to be so successful, that now there are some that are wrench-based, from blunt nosed to pin nosed.

Removable Bit Driver

Several manufacturers have created accessories for their multi-tools. They usually include “flat-head and crosshead screwdriver bits and/or socket for bolts.” (page 80)

Only you can decide if these accessories are helpful. Attitudes seem to be all across the spectrum — some folks swear by them, others swear at them!

Finally

The goal has been to give you a feel for what is available in multi-tools. This list is not exhaustive, I’ve tried to show the items most in demand. The good news is that there are models to fit anyone’s hand, pocketbook, needs.

Originally, these tools only came in large. Now models are available for the pocket and for the belt. Tool makers have taken a page from clothes designers – it’s easy to become attached to a model, before figuring out if it is really what you need!

Happy Shopping!

Mosey On Over to this Month’s Highlights: Did You Miss Any?

A Day at the Office!

Perhaps you have just joined this merry band of blog readers and haven’t checked my archives. Well, I’d like to tell you about this month’s hottest!

Most Hits This Month

Hands down, the most popular article this month was: The 10 Commandments of Knife Use and Maintenance.  It received hundreds more hits than any other offering in November!

Going to Other Sites for Amazing Photos

Lots of you are into “Amazing Stories.” Two of these that have gotten lots of air play are: ‘Good Grief! A 30 Point Deer! Shot with a Handmade Long Bow!’ and ‘The Most Expensive Deer Hunt Ever!’

MDH* sent a copy of the (grisly) photos and story on the “most expensive” but I couldn’t copy the photos onto my site. Not wanting to let you miss such yucky photos, I searched online for someone who DID have the photos and routed you to him.

If you will notice, you can’t remove or copy his, either. Stealing content and photos (and not giving credit to the person who created such) has gotten to be a real problem online.

More ‘Lead Poisoning in Venison’ Info

The second salvo in this on going ‘war of words’ emerged this month with: ‘Remember the Lead-in-Venison Controversy? Here’s an Update!’ Stay tuned, later this week, I will report on the CDC’s (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) findings on this issue (that just won’t go away).

Getting Some Reaction

Finally, I’ve been able to prove that someone reads my blog besides my mother. The 4 part report on ‘Shoot or Don’t Shoot Spikes’ has brought readers out of the woods (pun intended) long enough to comment.

What’s On Tap for December?

Besides the CDC report on lead poisoning in deer, I’ve just completed a 2 parter on ‘Multi-tools.’ Included are some tips on what to look for in a useful-to-you-tool.

Also, there will be another couple of installments about knives: blade types and their uses and ‘What to do When You Can’t Sharpen Your Old Knife Any More.’

Please join me!

There are two ways to get a FREE subscription:  Subscription button for feeds (top of right column) or Subscription link to get my postings via email (Click area is near “Top Posts”).

Although these postings/articles are PRICELESS, I’m making them available to YOU for nada (also known as: zip, zilch, zero). Can you really afford to miss out on this opportunity?

See you soon!

~~~

* MDH = My Deer Husband; also known as “He Who Likes to be Obeyed” – sadly he rarely is.

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Recipes #8: 2 Ways with Venison

Outsmarting Deer = Venison on the Table!

It has been more than 2 weeks since I shared a recipe with you. I have 2 venison recipes; let’s see if I have room for both today.

From Cooking for Your Man, by Yolanda Banks and Melissa Clark (2006, Broadway Books, ISBN = 0767921925; $17.95)

Pecan-Crusted Venison

The pecan crust adds crunch, while the oregano and marjoram add Italian flavor. Boiled or new potatoes are great as an accompaniment.

1 cup finely ground pecans

1/2 cup fresh bread crumbs

2 Tbsp. extra virgin olive oil

2 Tbsp. chopped fresh parsley

1 Tbsp. roasted garlic paste*

1 tsp. dried oregano

1 tsp. dried marjoram

Kosher or sea salt

freshly ground pepper

1 (3 to 5 lb) boneless venison roast, trimmed and tied with butcher twine

* Garlic paste is made by cutting the top 1/3 of a large garlic bulb off, sprinkling olive oil in the openings, sealing the bulb in foil and roasting in a 400 degree oven for 45 minutes. Allow to cool and mash the paste from the cloves. This is a milder product than using garlic directly.

6 Servings; preheat oven to 425 degrees

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In a small bowl, stir together the pecans, crumbs, oil, parsley, garlic paste, oregano, marjoram, salt and pepper. Season the venison generously with salt and pepper. Coat the venison with the nut mixture on all sides, pressing on the crust to help it adhere. Transfer the roast to a rack set over a rimmed baking sheet.

Roast until a meat thermometer registers at least 123 degrees F (8 to 12 minutes per pound), depending on desired doneness. Set the pan aside to rest for  10 minutes. Remove the twine, slice the meat and serve.

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Tex-Mex Venison with Spicy Cranberry Sauce

Venison is a meat that will hold up to as much spice as you want to add.  The cranberry sauce can be made a day or two in advance, so the flavors can meld. Makes 6 servings.

For the Spicy Cranberry Sauce:

1 Tbsp. unsalted butter

1Tbsp. finely chopped shallot

1 Tbsp. roasted garlic paste (see note above)

1 tsp. minced serrano chile pepper

1/2 cup port wine

1/2 cup low-sodium chicken broth or stock

1/2 cup cranberry juice

1 Tbsp. honey

1/2 cup dried cranberries

Kosher salt & freshly ground pepper

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1 tsp. ground cumin

1 tsp. ground coriander

1 tsp. ancho chile powder**

6 (4 to 6 oz. ) bone-in venison rib chops

Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper

2 Tbsp. extra virgin olive oil

** Ancho peppers are dried poblano peppers, triangular shaped, blue-black

Cranberry Sauce: In a small pan, over medium heat, melt butter. Add the shallot, garlic paste and serrano pepper. Saute until softened, about 5 mins. Raise the heat to medium-high. Add the port, bring to a boil, & simmer until the liquid is reduced to 2 Tbsp., about 5 mins.

Add the broth, cranberry juice and honey to the pan, and continue to simmer until the sauce is reduced by 1/3, about 7 minutes. Strain the sauce through a fine sieve, return it to the pan and set the pan over low heat. Add the dried cranberries and cook until they soften slightly, about 5 minutes. Taste and adjust seasonings, if necessary.

Venison: In a small bowl, combine the cumin, coriander and chili powder. Season the venison chops on both sides with salt, pepper and the spice mixture. Heat a large saute pan over medium-high heat. Add the oil and saute the venison for 3 minutes per side. Serve with the cranberry sauce.

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Please join me!

There are two ways to get a FREE subscription:  Subscription button for feeds (top of right column) or Subscription link to get my postings via email (Click area is near “Top Posts”).

Although these postings/articles are PRICELESS, I’m making them available to YOU for nada (also known as: zip, zilch, zero). Can you really afford to miss out on this opportunity?

See you soon!

~~~

* MDH = My Deer Husband; also known as “He Who Likes to be Obeyed” – sadly he rarely is.

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

~~~ Anatomy of a Fixed-Blade Knife ~~~

Knife salesmen/women love to fling around the jargon of their trade. It immediately puts THEM in the expert class — not you. Today just might be a good day to level-the-playing-field a bit. Our sub-title could be:

More Than You May Want to Know About a Knife

We’ll examine a fixed-blade knife today.

Anatomy of a Fixed Blade Knife!

1 – The Blade – The ‘business end’ of a knife.

2 – Handle – How you grip a knife.  The issue of a tang comes in here but I will save most of  this discussion for later.  One of the tang’s most important jobs is to give balance to a knife.

3 – Point or Tip of the knife. Its main function is to pierce or create a point of entry.

4 – The Edge – The cutting area of a knife that extends from the point to the blade heel.

5 - The Grind – Where the blade starts to get thinner. The area across the blade that starts at the thinning of the spine and ends at the blade edge.

6 – Spine – The top of the knife, opposite of the blade edge. It is usually thicker than the edge.

7 – The Fuller – An indentation on many knives that reduces the weight of the knife.  The fuller does not reduce the structural integrity of the knife, however.

8 – The Ricasso –  The thick part of the blade that has no edge; where the handle and blade meet.

9 - The Guard – This metal barrier protects the hand from injury.

10 - The Butt – The end of the knife.

11 - Hole for the Lanyard – A method for keeping the knife attached to the wrist, belt, etc.

The advantage of a fixed blade is that it is strong (single weapon from point to butt of knife). It has no moving parts and is easy to make.

In the 2nd entry, I mentioned the ‘tang.’ The tang is the part of the knife not usually seen. It is covered by the wood, plastic or other material of the handle.

To me, the tang is how I determine the value of the knife. A full tang indicates that the blade metal completely fills the handle (and can usually be seen above and below the handle material – as in the photo below). The full tang is indicated below by the first red dot, on the top edge of the handle. The other dots are not significant for this discussion.

Full Tang Knife!

Knives with partial tangs (the metal of the blade extending part way into the handle and held in place by rivets or pins), may also be an excellent knife.

Of the partial tangs, I feel the ‘rat tail’ tang to be the weakest (the knife blade narrows in the handle, to look like a rat tail comb).

The ‘push tang’ is the one you do not want. The tang end extends less than 1/2 the way into the handle. The tang has been pushed in and rivets used to hold it in place.

The next time the salesperson throws a little jargon your way, you can throw a little back!

Have a great weekend!

Recipes # 9: Deer Jerky

Stir Up Some Flavor Tonight!

This recipe calls for marinating the meat in these spices for 24 hours. During that time, the deer meat REALLY absorbs the mixture.

I usually use light soy sauce (~50% less salt than regular product). This is a personal choice, because MDH and I don’t need the salt.  Just want you to know that you have some options.

Deer Jerky

5 lbs. sliced deer meat

1 Tbsp. fine black pepper

3 Tbsp. coarse black pepper (often called ‘restaurant-style’)

1 Tbsp. salt

2 tsp. Accent tenderizer

1 Tbsp. garlic powder

1 Tbsp. onion powder

1/2 cup soy sauce

to taste – crushed red pepper

Marinate 24 hours in the refrigerator.

Smoke 2 to 4 hours.

Dry in oven @140 degrees F., or  in a hydrator.

Well, that’s the recipe. Here’s a bit more info if you are new to drying meat:

Dry – do not bake – in the 140 degree oven (or use a hydrator). If the oven is too hot, leave door ajar slightly. Drying time will vary depending on the humidity, thickness of the slices and fat content of the meat.

When removed from the oven, cool and store jerky in an open container to allow drying to  continue. Seal container to prevent further drying. Refrigerate for long storage.

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Join my little band of merry blogites!  Generally, I post Monday – Friday!  Be the first person on your block with the latest info!

There are two ways to get a FREE subscription: Subscription button for feeds (top of right column) or Subscription link to get my postings via email (Click area is near “Top Posts”).

Although these postings/articles are PRICELESS, I’m making them available to YOU for nada (also known as: zip, zilch, zero). Can you really afford to miss out on this opportunity?

Be careful: This offer may be withdrawn at any time!

~~~

See you soon!

~~~

* MDH = My Deer Husband; also known as “He Who Likes to be Obeyed” – sadly he rarely is.

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Recipes #10: When You’re Bored with Venison, Try Boar

Yummy Boar Bites!

Everyone should have a boar recipe in their collection! Actually, here’s one of each: Boar & Venison.

Black Forest Boar

from the April 1978 issue of American Rifleman

Coat 2 lbs. boar, cut into 2 inch cubes, in 1/4 cup flour mixed with 1 tsp. salt and freshly ground pepper (to taste).

Brown meat in 3 Tbsp. bacon fat; add 1 cut-up onion, 1 clove diced garlic, cook 5 minutes longer. Add 4 cups water, 1/4 tsp. dried rosemary, 1 Tbsp. parsley flakes.

Cook covered, 1 to 2 hours – until tender.  Add 4 potatoes, 4 carrots and 4 small onions (all 12 veggies chopped). Cook additional 30 minutes. Makes 4 servings.

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This recipe has been in my collection so long, I have no idea where it came from or who gave it. One thing for sure — this recipe pre-dates our concern about cholesterol!

Dr. Pulley’s Famous Venison Stew

2 lbs. boneless venison roast

1 cup bacon drippings

2 onions, chopped

2 ribs celery, chopped

4 carrots, cubed

2 potatoes, cubed

1 cup flour

Salt and pepper to taste

Heat bacon drippings in large, cast-iron pot and sear all surfaces of roast until golden brown in color. Transfer roast to a pot just large enough to hold it; reserve drippings.

Add water just to cover venison, season with salt & pepper (to taste) and simmer ~2 hours, or until tender. When ready, remove roast to platter, cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate overnight.

Reserve broth. In same broth venison was cooked in, boil veggies until tender – about 20 minutes.

Reheat the reserved bacon drippings in cast-iron pot. Add flour and stir constantly over medium low heat until flour is a rich brown color. When flour is browned, pour in 1 cup cold water. Stir well and add cooked veggies and their broth.

Cube the venison and add to the vegetables. Taste for seasonings and bring to a simmer to reheat. Serves 4 to 6.

~

Directions for slow cooker: I make Dr. Pulley’s Stew a little differently because I use a slow cooker.

Sear the cubed meat in olive oil, put in slow cooker. Saute onions & celery lightly in pan and add to slow cooker. De-glaze pan with a little water & scrape bits into cooker.

Add veggies, then meat, add 2 – 3 cups of water. Cook 6 – 8 hours in cooker.  Use some of cooking water to make gravy in a saucepan and return it to cooker. Adjust seasonings. Serve.

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There’s more to hunting than deer and rabbits! As soon as I find my notes, I’ll share the excitement and the drama of Javelina hunting! Fortunately, they taste better than they smell … check back later in the week! Learn fascinating trivia about these little stinkers! Peccaries have looks “only a mother could love!”

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Please join me!

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

What’s So Great About a Truck Tent?

Recently, I received an email from someone who expressed ’shock’ at seeing her first truck tents  – she’d never heard of them.  I realized that perhaps there were others who hadn’t seen the latest innovations in tents.

So, Why A Truck Tent?

Tent makers have listened for years to complaints about regular tents.  You know what they are: Uncomfortable sleeping on rocks and debris;   worry over getting wet during a rain shower;  the aggravation of tent poles that never seem to fit together; concern about leaving the truck in one place and camping elsewhere, concern about critters joining sleepers in the tent . . . .

What is a Truck Tent?

Uses Tailgate for Added Room!

Tent designers decided to turn the idea of a  tent on its ear! Incorporating the best points of  grounded tents, they created new solutions for camping challenges.

Truck tents are self-contained units that offer rain protection, excellent ventilation and easy set-up. The poles are color-coded and tents can be operational in 15 minutes, or less.

Sizes to Fit Most Trucks

Along with clever features and ease-of-use, truck tents are available to fit most trucks! Whether your truck has compact short bed, a full size step-side, a Dakota Quad Cab with 5.5′ bed, full size long or short bed, or most any other configuration, there’s a truck tent for you.

Things to Look For in a Truck Tent

Camo Camping in Comfort!

Creature comforts are emphasized in tents that are attached to trucks. Check the height of the tent – they can vary widely.

If you have a slider window, you may want access into the cab. Some models have this feature.

How is the tent held into place on your truck? Will the hooks used be kind to the finish on your truck?

Check for gear pockets and hooking systems that can be used to hang clothes or for lamp placement.  It’s helpful to have reflective zipper pulls for use at night.

Tents that are light (in color) on top offer more interior light in the tent. Conversely, dark topped tents are darker inside the tent – day and night.

What’s Next?

Next time, I’ll show the latest in camping style for folks with an SUV or other vehicle!  This will show the Lexus of camping!

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Need a Camping Checklist?

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I’m just getting started writing! If you want to be ‘in the know’ first – sign up for a FREE update on items – as I post them!  

Subscription button for feeds for my postings (top of right column) and (2) Subscription link to get my postings via email (Click area is near “Top Posts”).

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

~~~

I’d like to remind my readers that I sell truck tents on my site. However, the purpose of this posting  (and the next one) is education — not selling. Consumers with knowledge make better decisions.

All I Want for Christmas is … a Tent for my SUV!

When designers decided to turn the concept of a tent upside down, they didn’t stop with trucks. They reasoned that if a truck could contain a tent, so could an SUV, minivan or hatchback!

Talk About Unique!

Many of the SUV, minivan and hatchback designs allow the tent to be separate or attached to the vehicle. Therefore, you have the convenience of being able to leave the tent in place, while using the vehicle elsewhere.

How Do I Get the Tent Back Into This Tiny Bag?

Sportz SUV 83000 Tent with Screen Room

One of the biggest complaints from campers is that the tent never fits back into the original storage bag.  Designers were listening and have created unique ways to help people with two left hands successfully navigate the tent back into the bag.

Yeah, But Will it Fit My Vehicle?

Most of these new-generation tents are very specific about the size and model of the vehicles that fit a particular design.

If the information tag includes: “Fits most hatchbacks” — keep looking. That company is not attending enough to the needs of the customer. Great info tags specify exactly the models and years that fit any given tent.

Other Things to Watch

The standard height for SUV tents seems to be between 7 and 8 feet. This height is great for tall campers and creates a sense of spaciousness inside the tent. Don’t shortchange yourself!

Check what the flooring is made of before purchasing. I think the floor takes the most abuse and it should have ‘rip stop’ fabric or some similar treatment to ensure good looks and long lasting comfort.

Warranties are a must with these tents. One-year is the minimum time  a tent should be under warranty. Ninety days simply isn’t enough time to check for manufacturer’s defects.

Dome-to-Go Tents!

Keep in mind: Generally, tents are water-resistant, not water-proof.

Check the fabric carefully. I think cotton and canvas are poor choices because of the issues of  mildew and condensation. One of the quickest ways to ruin a tent is to put it away wet.  Even Polyester/Titanium fabric (one of the best) is no match for storing a wet tent.

Some Cautions

Remember that your SUV/Truck tents are situated near the fuel source and exhaust pipe of your vehicle. This calls for some extra precautions.

Do not use fuel-powered lanterns or heaters inside these tents. Candles, matches and open flames should not be used inside.

While the tent is installed in/on your vehicle, the vehicle cannot be moved.

These new generation tents attached to vehicles are making camping converts far and wide. Perhaps they are just what you need for your next camping or hunting trip.

Santa, are you listening?

~~~

Need a Camping Checklist?

Recipes #11: Deer Chili in a Slow Cooker

Chili for Chilly Weather!

This is a tried-and-true recipe for chili-heads. Actually it won the 1988 Chili Cook-Off in Potsdam, East Germany, sponsored by the US Military Liaison in Berlin.

“Brazos River Bottom Killed-on-the-Road Texas Chili” – is a fairly unlikely title but was concocted by two brothers, Richard and Mark Beto of Brazos County.

The good news is that it is not necessary for your venison to be ‘road kill’ for this to taste GREAT!   Enclosed are 3 ways of cooking; we enjoy the third — but 30 hours cooking isn’t always reasonable.

Brazos River Bottom Killed-on-the-Road Texas Chili

3 lbs. venison AND 1 lb. pork, coarsely ground or cubed

2 large white onions, chopped

8 garlic cloves, chopped, not pressed

2 (10 oz.) cans diced tomatoes with green chilies

2 (10 oz.) cans of water

1 cup chili powder (yes, 1 cup)

4 tsp. paprika

5 tsp. oregano

1 tsp. ground cumin

1/4 cup masa harina (Mexican corn flour)

Place meat, onions and garlic in a large pot or skillet and cook until the meat is browned.  Drain, if necessary.

Add the rest of the ingredients (EXCEPT the masa harina) and cook 1 and 1/2 hours. Mix masa harina with 1/2 cup HOT water and stir. Add this mixture to the pot and let it cook until the sauce thickens.

Add salt and pepper, to taste. Serve.

Slow Cooker Directions: After searing meat, onions and garlic, add to slow cooker. Add all other ingredients EXCEPT masa harina. Cook on high for 6 to 8 hours. Add hot water mixed with masa harina and cook until thickened.

Richard’s Slow Cooker Directions: After searing meat, onions and garlic, add to slow cooker. Add all other ingredients EXCEPT masa harina. Cook on low for 30 hours (yes, thirty) hours. Add hot water mixed with masa harina and cook until thickened.

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While LBJ was president, Lady Bird Johnson gave this recipe to the newspapers – LBJ’s favorite chili recipe!

LBJ’S PERDERNALES RIVER CHILI

3 lbs. venison AND 1 lb. pork – cubed or coarsely ground

1 large onion, chopped

2 cloves garlic, crushed

1 tsp. oregano, crushed

1 tsp. cumin

2 Tbsp. chili powder

2 cans ROTEL canned tomatoes and green chilies (Hot, Original or Mild      - your choice)

2 cups water

Cayenne pepper, to taste

Sear meat in large, dry skillet until lightly browned. Add onion and garlic and saute.

Add seasonings, tomatoes, water and hot pepper. Bring mixture to boil. Reduce heat and simmer about 1 hour. Skim off any fat that accumulates. Serves 8 – 10.

Slow Cooker Directions: After browning meat, garlic and onion, put all ingredients EXCEPT seasonings (oregano , cumin, chili powder, cayenne powder) into pot. Cook on high 4 or 5 hours; low temperature = 8 hours. Add seasonings during the last 30 minutes.

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

What’s the Difference Between Assault Weapons and Sporting Rifles?

You Tube has an excellent video: Comparing a fully automatic assault rifle with a semi automatic rifle with a semi automatic rifle for sportsmen and women.

Do You Tweet?

It is just under 11 minutes and well worth your time. The instructor is Officer Leroy Pyle of the San Jose, California Police Dept.

He explains how the weapons are alike and how they are different. He, and others make several interesting points.

One point is: during the collection of 50,000 + weapons, California has NEVER collected a semi automatic gun that has been re-configured into an assault weapon.

Therefore, the contention that every drug lord has an arsenal of fully automatic assault weapons is incorrect.

The location of the video is:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysf8×477c30

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

~~~

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EasyOnline Latest: Recipes #11: Deer Chili in a Slow Cooker posted at http://marylouise22.wordpress.com… Chili for Chilly Weather!

Deer Smuggling: Don’t Try This At Home

Expensive Racks!

Since gun-running and drug smuggling have gotten so dicey – thieves have a new ploy — ‘wild deer smuggling.’ Wonder if it’s worth it? A breeding whitetailed buck with the ‘right genetics’ auctions for $500,000!

Who Buys Smuggled Whitetails?

Brian Becker, owner of a deer breeding facility in Minnesota was caught delivering 8 wild deer to a posh hunter’s spread called Circle E Ranch, in Grimes County (TX), between Navasota and Huntsville.

Circle E Ranch offers a wide range of game – from addax to wildebeest and zebra. Accommodations are $250/day, with a 3 day minimum. There’s also a fee for each animal shot – a zebra, including field dressing, costs $6,500.

Follow the Money

Becker was willing to take the gamble — he’d earned $300,000 from the owner of Circle E Ranch, Robert L. Eichenour, over the past 4 years!  He’d driven these whitetails over 1000 miles (I hope gas was extra).

It’s hard to say just how prevalent this practice is in America. The US Fish & Wildlife Service and Texas Parks & Wildlife avow that the practice is profitable and common. Others (land owners and ranch managers) don’t see it that way.

Why It’s Illegal

Texas is a closed state, meaning that deer cannot be imported from other states. Why? Because many states are battling “bovine tuberculosis and chronic wasting disease, a devastating condition likened to mad-cow disease but spread among deer, elk and moose.”

This is serious: Minnesota, where the deer lived, has spent $30 million trying to eradicate the disease in their wild deer. Texas, which has no such infestation, has banned the importation of wild or domesticated deer, to protect their herds.

A Hefty Price on Their  Whitetailed Heads

Because of the ban, deer with large racks, are in high demand. Deer with antler racks scoring between 140 and 149 on the Boone and Crockett Scale, are very popular. Trophy deer in this class can easily cost the hunter between $2,500 and $15,000 (for each animal shot). Mounting extra, of course.

A Hefty Price When You Get Caught

Brian Becker, on probation for smuggling deer into Oklahoma in 2005, earned a 33 month sentence by a federal court in Plano.  Wealthy Houston-area businessman, Robert L Eichenour,  got 18 months in jail and a $50,000 fine.

Both men had pleaded guilty. Some Grimes County citizens were surprised by the jail-time.  ”We see murderers and rapists given probation, but bring a whitetail deer to Texas, and you do federal time,” Constable Dale Schaper said.

Grimes County Judge Gene Stapleton said the 18-month sentence “totally ruins [Eichenour’s] life. If you are going to ruin someone’s life, ruin a drug dealer’s life.”

Not-So-Warm-And-Fuzzy-Words from Other Deer Breeders

On the other side of the fence were the deer breeders.  ”I am outraged,” said Mike Lamb, a West Texas whitetail deer breeder and rancher.

“I’ve spent a lot of money proving my deer are tested and healthy. An outbreak from smuggled deer would totally wipe me out. Nothing is worth the risk, and to have people exposing the wildlife population to make a few thousand is just ridiculous.”

The whole story is here: http://www.star-telegram.com/news/story/1078126.html

From the Fort Worth Star-Telegram, article by Barry Schlachter

~~~

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Tips to Make Sure Your Game is ‘Taxidermy Ready!’

Magnificent Mounts!

Don’t be Singing the ‘Taxidermy Blues’

If you’ve been hoping to add a handsome trophy to your wall, a few cautions could ensure your trip to the taxidermist to be successful.

There’s nothing worse than being told that you ruined your beautiful specimen while field dressing your game. What are some of the basic do’s and don’ts?

Some Do’s

• Bring a camera and take lots of photos.  Taxidermists will tell you that your animal is as individual as you are. Photos help him/her recreate your treasure!
• Going bird hunting? Get your wife to donate her old nylon pantyhose/stockings. Your birds may look funny in the hose, but that protects the bird’s feathers until you get to the taxidermist.
• Want a shoulder mount of your trophy deer? Go to: http://www.foresttaxidermy.com/quality_mount.htm for some great visuals — where and how to cut your animal.
• After field dressing, make sure your animal’s skin stays dry and cool. The skin should be iced immediately; but make sure it stays dry in the cooler. It should be  kept cool all the way to  the taxidermist’s shop.
• Have a bighorn sheep or antelope to mount? Pay particular attention to blood stains on the skin/fur. Remove immediately because the blood will stain!

Some Don’ts

• Don’t even THINK about dragging your game; carrying or packing your game is important. Dragging an animal ruins the hair. I don’t think you will want a cute bow covering the raw spot on the deer’s hide!
• Some hunters don’t know when to quit — with the knife. Repeat after me: “I will never cut the animal’s throat or front quarter, if I want to mount my specimen.”
• Go back to the visual drawings listed above for directions on cutting animals.
• Don’t salt your cape. Why? Do you want a bald spot(s) on your animal? A cape that is salted before the meat, etc., are removed – runs the chance of the salt not penetrating the hide/fur and losing the fur.  Leave the salting to the taxidermy staff.
• Want to  mount a coyote, bird, fox, or other small mammal? DO NOT SKIN the animal. Bring the whole animal to the taxidermist – packed in ice and dry.
• Got a skin to take to the taxidermist? Put it in a plastic bag and keep it cool. Bagged skin without ice is a bacteria-generating machine that can lead to fur loss.
• Get your specimen to the taxidermy shop quickly. If you store the skin in a “frost free freezer’  for long periods of time, you could develop freezer burn. Why? ‘Frost free’ stays that way by drawing moisture out of the meat and freezer.

Helpful Tips

I hope these tips lead to a great mounted beauty on your wall!

~~~

I’m feeling under the weather today, with a terrible head cold. I hope this is complete. If I’ve left something out, let me know in the comments section!

Bah Humbug! A Cold for Christmas!

Bah Humbug!

This isn’t what I was hoping for under the Christmas tree!

My terrible head cold has turned ugly.

Right now, nothing seems very funny.

However, here’s a great story and super photos: http://www.alphatrilogy.com/0336/bbd-i-took-a-nice-whitetail-buck-on-opening-day-of-2008-missouri-firearms-season.html

Today’s Joke: How to Get Banned from Wal-Mart Stores

After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband   accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.

Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton — like most men — found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out.  Alas, Mrs. Fenton — like most women — loved to look around and browse.

One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her local Wal-Mart –

Dear Mrs. Fenton,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be forced to ban both of you from the store.

Our complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below and have been carefully documented  by our video surveillance cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people’s carts when they weren’t looking.

2 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s  restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
“Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away.”

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M’s on  layaway.

6. September 14: Moved a “CAUTION – WET FLOOR” sign to a carpeted area.

7. September 15: Set up a tent in the Camping Department and told other  shoppers he’d invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the Bedding Department.

8. September 23: When a clerk asked if anyone could help him, he began crying and screamed,  ”Why can’t you people just leave me alone?”

9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror, while he picked his nose.

10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. December 3: He darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the “Mission Impossible” theme.

12. December 6: In the auto department, he practiced his “Madonna look” by using different sizes of funnels.

13. December 18: Your husband hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, he yelled, “PICK ME! PICK ME!”

14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position on the floor and screamed,  ”OH NO! IT´S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!”

And last, but not least

15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,  then yelled very loudly,  ”Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here!”

Regards,

Wal-Mart

~~~

As always, “Thanks” to Dorothy139 for providing today’s humor!

~~~

I Hope You Don’t Think I’m Jealous, Darrell!

If you’ve scanned my blogroll, you may have noticed that I list  “Rantings of an Outdoorsman.”

All this time, I’ve been waiting for Darrell, site guru and hunter extraordinaire, to start “ranting” (as his site name seems to promise).  However, after seeing his photos over the past few days, I know the REAL STORY.

Tiptoe Through the Photos

A couple of days ago, I suggested my readers go check out his photos (and great story), dated 27 November 2008.  ”BBD! My Nice Whitetail Buck from Opening Day of 2008 Missouri Firearms Season.”

Was he satisfied when we drooled all over his photos? Of course not.

To heap on the grief, he just happens to have a few pictures of his Iowa hunt, dated 17 December 2008!

And Now — The “Awful” Truth

“Rantings of an Outdoorsman” has nothing to do with Darrell. “Rantings” has everything to do with those of us who read his blog!

I used to think Darrell was one of the luckiest hunters ever. Over the past months, I’ve come to realize that luck is really overrated. He must have considerable talent (but please don’t tell him I said that).

Be Careful

If you have a fragile psyche (and have not shot a deer this season), Darrell’s blog  may send you to the anti-depressant aisle of your local drug store.

However, those of you with a sturdier constitution (and a freezer full of deer), will undoubtedly enjoy http://www.AlphaTrilogy.com

Two Questions

Does Darrell’s diet include venison 21 meals/week? *

I can get a group therapy rate for “deer envy;” anybody interested?

~~~

* Perhaps he can market a new craze – “Darrell’s Deer Diet!” I can hear the ca-chings already!

~~~

Yes, I’m still feeling awful (and the photos on www.AlphaTrilogy.com don’t help a bit)       {you know I’m kidding, right?}.  Monday, I’ll get back to serious writing.  Have a great weekend!

Thought for the day: Do something good for your mental health this weekend — stay out of the stores!  Go hunting instead!

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

~~~

~~~Today’s Joke: “Making a Baby”~~~

I’ve been saving this joke for months — for just the right opportunity to share this gem!

~~~

A Couple Looking for a Baby!

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, ‘Well, I’m off now. The man should be here soon.’

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. ‘Good morning, Ma’am’, he said, ‘I’ve come to…’

‘Oh, no need to explain,’ Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, ‘I’ve been expecting you.’

‘Have you really?’ said the photographer. ‘Well, that’s good. Did you know babies are my specialty?’

‘Well that’s what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat.’

After a moment she asked, blushing, ‘Well, where do we start?’

‘Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there.’

‘Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn’t work out for Harry and me!’

‘Well, Ma’am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I’m sure you’ll be pleased with the results.’

‘My, that’s a lot!’, gasped Mrs. Smith.

‘Ma’am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I’d love to be ‘In- and-out-in-five-minutes’, but I’m sure you’d be disappointed with that.’

‘Don’t I know it,’ said Mrs. Smith quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. ‘This was done on the top of a bus,’ he said.

‘Oh, my word!’ Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

‘And these twins turned out exceptionally well – when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with.’

‘She was difficult?’ asked Mrs. Smith.

‘Yes, I’m afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look.’

‘Four and five deep?’ said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.

‘Yes’, the photographer replied. ‘And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling – I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in..’

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. ‘Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh…equipment?’

‘It’s true, Ma’am, yes.. Well, if you’re ready, I’ll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away.’

‘Tripod?’

‘Oh yes, Ma’am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It’s much too big to be held in the hand very long.’

Mrs. Smith fainted.

~~~

Dorothy139 sends me these jokes occasionally and they are priceless….”Thanks!” She has a circle of friends who ’round robin’ the latest jokes. I feel lucky to be included.

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

~~~

Do you “tweet”? For the latest, when it is published, follow my twitter reports @ http://twitter.com/marylouise22.comClick on “Home” and it will take you to my latest tweets!

~~~

Recipes #12: Deer Chili – Slow Cooker or Not

Chili Tonite & Hot Tamale!

It must be obvious to you by now that I gravitate towards chili recipes with colorful names.  Today is no exception; Buzzard’s Breath Chili is a fun name for a great bowl of red!

This recipe is unique for another reason. If you worry about the spices you add to chili, this one explains some spice uses – and this info carries over to other cooking. Enjoy!

Buzzard’s Breath Chili

8 lbs. venison or 6 lbs. venison and 2 lbs. chili grind pork

3 small cans tomato sauce (8 ounces each)

2 large onions, chopped

5 cloves garlic, crushed and chopped

2 jalapeno peppers

Chili powder – about twice the label amount (I use between 1 & 2 Tbsp.)

Cumin – 2 tsp.

Oregano – 1/2 tsp.

Salt – to taste

Paprika – 1 to 2 tsp.

Cayenne Pepper – to taste

Masa harina- as needed

Beef stock – 1 quart

Chop venison into 3/8″ cubes, removing all gristle/visible fat. Add chili grind pork. Brown in an iron skillet – about 2 lbs. at a time, until gray in color.

Place all seared meat into a large cast iron chili pot, adding tomato sauce and equal amounts of water.  Add chopped onion, garlic, jalapeno peppers (wrapped in cheese cloth), and chili powder.

Simmer 20 minutes, then add ground cumin, oregano, salt and cayenne pepper to taste. As moisture is required, add homemade beef stock until the quart is used, then add water.

Simmer covered until meat is tender (approximately two hours), stirring occasionally, then add masa harina, to achieve desired thickness.

If needed, add paprika for color.  Cook 10 more minutes, correct seasoning to taste, discard jalapenos and serve. Small amount of cumin enhances aroma when added in the last 10 minutes. Makes 12 servings.

Notes:

• Make chili as hot as preferred by varying cayenne pepper.
• Too much oregano will deaden chili, use sparingly.
• A thick, rich sauce is the secret of good chili; a good homemade beef stock guarantees the sauce.
• Any personal additions to chili, such as beans, cheese, green onions, corn chips or crackers should be served separately, allowing each person his choice.
• Any good chili powder should make this chili, but the best are those brands using California or New Mexico chilies.

Addendum: To make the original Buzzard’s Breath Chili, the creator advocates the addition of dried red ants to enhance the flavor, plus cigar ashes to achieve the proper thickness (yep, you read correctly – ants and cigar ashes. I just copy; I don’t create).

He also said that his chili should be prepared over an open cow-chip fire; however, local ordinances and EPA regulations often prohibit this.

What the creator didn’t mention: Add ~ 1/3 masa harina to ~ 1/2 cup hot water. Stir until it starts to expand, add to chili. Stir into chili. If you need more thickening, do it again.

Slow Cooker Directions: Sear meat and add to large cooker, adding tomato sauce and equal amounts of water.  Add chopped onion, garlic, jalapeno peppers (wrapped in cheese cloth).

Cook ~ 6 to 8 hours. One-half hour before finished, add all remaining spices to pot. Add masa harina, as specified above. Let simmer for half hour and remove jalapeno peppers (in cheese cloth) and serve.

(Copied from the Houston Chronicle, at least 15 years ago.)

My Recipe Collection for 2008

Here's The Whole Enchilada!

These recipes have been spread out over so many months, you may  have missed some.

(Recipes #1) Turn Wild Birds into Gourmet Fare (1 of 2) – Fried                                 Doves and Smothered Doves

(Recipes #2) Turn Wild Birds into Gourmet Fare (2 of 2) – Dove                                and Sausage Gumbo and Sherry Ducks

(Recipes #3) Turning Wild Birds into Fine Dining - General Wild                                Duck Info, Wild Geese Info, Holly Gravy Ducks

(Recipes #4) Just Ducky – Wild Duck – Chesapeake Barbecued                                          Duck and Roasted Wild Duck

(Recipes #5) Cooking Up a Wild Game Marinade - Marinade For                                  for venison, duck, goose, fresh pork or lamb roast

(Recipes #6) Tex-Mex Duckling - Tex-Mex Duckling

(Recipes #7) Wild Game in the Slow Cooker - Venison Stew with                                  Mushrooms

Recipes #8: 2 Ways with Venison – Pecan-Crusted Venison, Tex-                                    Mex Venison

Recipes # 9: Deer Jerky – How to make Deer Jerky

Recipes #10: When You’re Bored with Venison, Try Boar – Black Forest Boar & Dr. Pulley’s Venison Stew

Recipes #11: Deer Chili in a Slow Cooker – “Brazos River Bottom                                     Killed-on-the-Road Texas Chili” and LBJ’s River Chili

Recipes #12: Deer Chili – Slow Cooker or Not – Buzzard’s Breath                                     Venison Chili

Recipe Idea: What Can I do with a Duck Carcass After                                                    Cleaning?

2008 Decals & Graphics: CamoClad; Harley-Davidson, Etc.

Going for a Spin!

Generally, I write several articles on any given topic.  Because they are spread out over the year, it’s hard to know there are other companion pieces.

~~~

NASCAR Graphics -Super Hot!

As the year winds down, I’m rearranging some of the more popular articles into groupings.  Whether you are new to my blog or a regular, you might have missed one or more. Enjoy!

Harley-Davidson is Hot!

Tongue-in-Cheek Humor from  CamoClad   posted __21 August 2008

New Products Available – Harley                                    ___24 Sept. 2008                  Davidson & CamoClad

Why Are Rear Window Graphics So Popular?           ____5 Oct. 2008

CamoClad: Why is it the Finest Removable                 ___11 Oct. 2008                     Decal Kit Available?

A Couple of Unusual Ways with CamoClad                  ___30 Oct. 2008

Removable CamoClad Decals! Clickable for more info!

~~~

Still to Come

These are already written and coming your way soon!

Amazing Info/Photos of 2008: Published by (Gasp) Others!

2008’s Best Jokes from EasyOnlineOrdering.com Weblog

ForYourInfo: Changes Coming to My Website!

Mosey On Over to December’s Highlights: Did You Miss Any?

The New Year

Articles “in the works” include –

How to Apply CamoClad to Your Vehicle

What to do When You Can’t Sharpen Your Old Knife Any More

~~~

‘Thank you’ to all of my readers for making December such a successful month!  Readership took a HUGE jump this month. For that I’m very grateful.

My husband, Richard, and my mother say  ”thanks” too.  They were getting tired of hearing me moan — “But you and Mom are my only readers!”

It’s shaping up to be a great 2009!

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

2008’s Jokes from EasyOnlineOrdering.com Weblog

Writing Your Own Blog

Everyone Needs a Laugh!

Everyone has an idea about what it takes to be a successful blogger.   Being wildly enthusiastic about your topic isn’t enough – writer’s block and “dry spells” are a fact of life.

I’ve found that blogs that get “a lot of buzz” generally use the humor angle regularly.  Heaven knows, with these anxious times, everyone is looking for a chuckle or two.

Playing the “Humor” Card

However, it is not necessary to be funny. It is more important to have fun-loving friends!  Case-in-point: I can’t tell a joke, but my friends send a steady stream of sight-jokes, slap-stick humor and silly photos.

“Dorothy139″ is my hero(ine)! She’s the driving force behind the best jokes on this site. Where does she get them from? Her friends!

Hey, I may not be able to write a joke — but I know how to push the “print” key on any photocopier!  All I’m saying is – in the blogging business – it isn’t what you know, but who you know!

Humor at its Best

Today’s Joke:  Redneck Tube Top ___Posted ____21 August 2008

Hunting Joke: Be Quiet                                                ____6 Sept. 2008

Joke for the Day: The Truck Stop                               ___29 Sept. 2008

Be Careful What You Wish For …                             ____4 Oct. 2008

Today’s Joke: Boudreaux & Band-Aids               _____15 Oct. 2008

A Wild Game Marinade with a Little Humor ____5 Nov. 2008

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Do you “tweet”? For the latest, when it is published, follow my twitter reports @ http://twitter.com/marylouise22.com Click on “Home” and it will take you to my latest tweets!

What Can I do with a Duck Carcass After Cleaning?**

Boil That Bird!

** I’ve updated this article recently. It was posted 21 June 2009, Part 2: How & Why Do I Use a Duck Carcass?

This question keeps coming up – people insert these words into a search engine and they get my site.  I’ve never really answered this question directly and now would be a good time to do so.

The answer is going to be the same whether you have a chicken, hen, duck, goose, turkey or other “largish” fowl – domestic or wild.

~~~

What’s So Great About a Fowl Carcass?

There are three basic reasons I would boil a poultry carcass:

1) The comparison between a quart of  chicken/fowl stock versus a quart of water and bouillon versus purchased chicken/fowl stock is non-existent.

They aren’t even in the same zip code! Stock that has been simmered has so much more flavor!

2) In these tough economic times, it doesn’t make sense to toss the carcass without deriving its goodness for your table.

3) Scientists have proven that the “old wive’s tale” of giving chicken soup to an invalid is NOT an old wive’s tale. There is scientific proof that the nutrients leached from the carcass during cooking are needed by the body to help it recover – from whatever ails them!

The nutrients derived in this way are easier for the elderly to assimilate into their bodies.

All This Sounds Like a Lot of Trouble

Put the fowl carcass into a slow cooker, cover with water, add some onion, 1 tsp. sea salt, garlic (got celery and carrots? add them), and turn it on (low or high)  as you go to bed. How much trouble is that?

In the morning, take the liner out of the cooker, let it cool and put it into the refrigerator (with the lid on) just before you leave.

In the evening, you can skim off the fat (or not, your choice) and pour the juice (strain out the veggies and carcass – discard them) into containers and freeze. If there are tidbits of the meat left from the bones, I add it to the broth.

Now What?

Any soup, stew, gravy — whatever you make from this stock will be 100% more valuable to your body than the purchased, the bullion or the plain water.

I can think of dozens of uses for this stock. Save it for colds season and make soup. Use it as a base for black bean soup (or any other dried beans/legumes).

Use it as the base for a chicken stew (toss into a slow cooker:  onions, carrots, potatoes, garlic, celery, leftover chicken, whatever you have). Let it cook for 6 to 8 hours, adjust seasonings, enjoy!

Finally

Our forefathers and fore mothers never wasted anything. Creating their own fish or chicken or beef stock is one of the ways they stayed healthy.

BTW, I always add a teaspoon of sea salt to any stock I’m creating from a carcass. Salt helps leach more nutrients out of the bones.

Do I use quail or doves for this? No, they are too small.

Hopes this helps someone!

~~~This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com~~~

Do you “tweet”? For the latest, when it is published, follow my twitter reports @ http://twitter.com/marylouise22.com Click on “Home” and it will take you to my latest tweets!

2008 Collection: Hunting Clothes & UV Brighteners

What UV Brighteners?

This is a fascinating topic – that won’t go away. Why? A clever company has found a way to capitalize on a glitch in the hunter’s clothing market.

Is this a Serious Problem?

I don’t know; it depends on who is doing the talking.  Some folks swear by “UV-Killer” and some swear at it.

So far, I’ve been unable to determine if there’s another way to remove UV brighteners, once they’ve been added to hunting garments.

MDH doesn’t have a single garment that does not have  UV brighteners (in other words, everything he wears has the brighteners, which is supposed to be the ‘kiss of death’ for hunters).

Yet, Richard hauls home at least one deer or elk every year. He seems unfazed by the problem. Is it because he’s always in a blind (thus deer cannot see his clothing)?  No, he stalks game too.

I hear from others who wouldn’t dream of setting foot in a hunting situation without all clothing being carefully cleaned of UV brighteners.

Anyway, the issue is as intriguing as it has always been. Here are the articles relating to this issue, for your perusal.

Why’s That Nasty ‘Ol UV Stuff Hangin’ ‘Round My Huntin’ Clothes?

Hunting News: Why You Just Might Not        posted__ 1 October 2008                      Get a Turkey or a Deer this Year!

A Few More Facts About Deer Hunting     _________ 3 October 2008

Anyone Out There? Questions for My Readers!    ____ 8 October 2008

Words of Wisdom & A Bit of Humor ______________21 October 2008

Answers to Questions from Recent  Articles _______  27 Oct. 2008

UV Brighteners: We’ve Got the News ____________    3 Nov. 2008

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

2008 Round-Up: Ghillie Suit Info!

At one point, I thought I was an “expert” on ghillie suits. Hah! Innovation is happening so rapidly that it is now hard just to stay up with Ghillie gear!

This Year’s Articles:

A Few Tips on Buying a Ghillie Suit       posted 6 November 2008

More Tips about Ghillie or Camo Wear                    10 November 2008

Matching Your Ghillie Wear to Your Hunting      11 November 2008

What Your Mama Taught You about Hunting      12 November 2008

2008 Round-Up: The Many Facets of Knives

Knives#1: Why Can’t Guys Just Have One        posted 23 October ‘08                              Knife for Everything?

Knives#2: Why are Knives Made of Such                         28 Oct. 2008                                Weird Sounding Stuff?

Knives: #3: What do You Know About Knife                   29 Oct. 2008                               Blades & the Rockwell Scale?

Knives: #4: Why are There So Many Blade Shapes?      20 Nov. ‘08

Knives #5: Which is Best – Fixed Blade or a                      25 Nov. 2008                                  Folding Knife?

Knives #6: The Tanto, Drop Point and Sheepsfoot Blades  9 Dec. 2008

The 10 Commandments of Knife Use &  Maintenance             22 Nov. ‘08

Anatomy of a Fixed-Blade Knife                                                     5 Dec. 2008

2008 At a Glance: Lead-in-Venison Controversy

Lead-in-Venison Controversy!

States played leap-frog over each other to see who could raise the alarm loudest. The only thing they forgot to do —  test even one package of venison!

This is another of those ‘much-ado-about-nothing’ stories. Watch the progression (your taxes being wasted) here.

Report on Lead-in-Venison & Lead Poisoning   posted___ 14 Oct. ‘08

Remember the Lead-in-Venison Controversy?                          _3 Nov ‘08                   Here’s an Update!

Round 3: CDC Weighs in on Lead-Poison-in-Deer Issue          _2 Dec. ‘08

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2008 Collection: Articles About Shooting Spike Deer

This is not a Spike!

There’s lots of controversy over whether to shoot a spike.  Drawing on a ‘white paper’ from the Texas Parks & Wildlife, I explained the reasoning behind their stance on this issue.

I’m sure this will not satisfy all hunters, but they do provide a great deal of evidence to prove their hypothesis. If you are trying to improve your deer herd, this is some worthwhile reading!

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1) Should I Shoot a Spike While Hunting White-  posted 21 Nov. ‘08

2) Why Don’t We Just Let that Little Spike Grow Up?          24 Nov. ‘08

3) What About Spikes While Whitetail Deer Hunting?        26 Nov. ‘08

4) “This Spike is Better Lookin’ Than Any Ol’                           28 Nov. ‘08                                     6 Point Deer!”

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Amazing Info of 2008: Published by (Gasp) Others!

What a Rack! 30 Points of "Oh, My Goodness!"

Yep, I hate to admit it. Others have produced some really great posts. Some were outrageously funny, some are just outrageous! All of these are worth your time….

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Guess What I Found? Duck Cleaning Video  Posted __21 Oct. 2008 Online!

Eat Your Heart Out: Amazing New MS State     ______22 Oct. 2008                      Archery Record!

The Most Expensive Deer Hunt Ever!                 ______ 18 Nov. 2008

Good Grief! A 30 Point Deer! Shot with a Hand-  ____22 Nov. 2008                      made Long Bow!

What’s the Difference Between Assault Weapons ____15 Dec. 2008                      and Sporting Rifles?

Most Important Choice

Probably the ‘YouTube’ show,  “What’s the Difference Between Assault Weapons & Sporting Rifles?” Leroy Pyle does more to dispel the emotion from these words than anyone else I’ve seen to date.

This video lasts less than 12 minutes and demonstrates the items under discussion.  His language is clear and low-key; just what is needed.

Most Useful

Without a doubt, learning how to clean a duck from a master hunter is wonderful. Don’t be put off by the fact this series (of 5 short videos) was produced with young hunters in mind.

Oh My Gosh!

I think the remaining 3 items fit this category to a ‘T.’  I still have a hard time believing the photography of The Most Expensive Deer Hunt Ever! The word is that this is real!

Eat Your Heart Out: Amazing New MS State Archery Record! is another jaw-dropper!  Congrats to Michael Burkley!

The last time I checked UrbanLegends.com – they still hadn’t decided if this was a spoof or a real story — Good Grief! A 30 Point Deer! Shot with a Handmade Long Bow!  Never the less, it’s a great photo!

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The Year Isn’t Over

“Well, it ain’t over till it’s over,” sums up this latest story – just noticed it a few minutes ago on Rocky Mountain News.

Randy Goodman of Sedalia, Mo., reminds us all why Missouri is the “Show Me” State.  He went to collect the 240 lb. deer he’d just shot – twice.

Getting ready to pack his – obviously dead – 9 pointer back to camp, Goodman made a small mistake.  He forgot to make sure the deer was completely dead.

The deer took offense,*  jumped up and attacked the veteran hunter with his antlers and bulk.  The rest of the story is at: http://www.livescience.com/strangenews/081202-ap-deer-attack.html or @ http://www.rockymountainnews.com/news/2008/dec/02/wounded-deer-attacks-hunter-who-shot-him/

A Sadder & Wiser Good Man!

* The deer seems to have been offended that Mr. Goodman didn’t “SHOW ME I’M DEAD!’ (Even the deer are into the “show me” mindset!) Sheesh!

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Thank You, WordPress

Let it Snow!

Snow for the holidays — what a wonderful idea. Snow for the holidays that you don’t have to shovel — utopia!

Snow in South Texas

Generally, it doesn’t snow much in South Texas (south of Houston).  That’s why it has been such a great addition to my WordPress Weblog to have snow gently drifting down the pages!

I’ve had all of the positives of snow with none of the negatives (shoveling, melting, wet shoes and clothes, slick streets, dangerous driving, etc.)

The Snow Will Melt

Unfortunately, all good things come to an end. 4 January is the last date of snowfall on our websites. Enjoy it while it lasts!

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Another “Oh, My” Story: A Piebald Buck!

Incredible!

The Latest from MDH*

This is a Piebald Buck – nabbed by a hunter in WI.

What a Magnificent Beast!

He sent these photos  around to folks & the owner of Cabella’s paid him $13,000 for the head and hide. A calico buck like this one is rarer than an albino.

Astonishing!

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*MDH = My Deer Husband

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The Question: Can You Take the Wild Taste Out of Venison?

Not the Subject of this Post, but it IS an Original!

So far today, there have been 5 requests for this info – from folks who asked a search engine to direct them to a site with the answer.  Let me do a bit more research about this and give a response later.

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All of this is a bunch of words saying — Stay tuned while I check my facts. I hope to respond this pm.

#1 of 3: Can You Take the Wild Taste Out of Venison?**

Don't Take Risks With the Game You Shoot!

Essentially, there are two major times your handling of the meat affects the deer’s taste:  just after the deer is killed and just before you cook the venison.

When I Know the Venison Will Be Awful

When I see proud hunters, with deer draped over the truck top or hanging out of the back of a truck while they are driving, I shudder. They certainly weren’t in it for the meat!

That meat is going to be “gamy” – if not outright spoiled. What are they thinking? Driving down I-45 on a day like today (temperature was 72), just how long would you expect a piece of beef to remain edible, on the top of a truck?

Critical Timing

The few hours after slaying the deer  are critical! Quick field dressing (more on this next time) is essential. Some folks, shooting a deer about dark, leave the body in the snow, to dress it in the am. This is a fatal error!

Another item critical to the taste of the venison meat is — washing out the carcass with water ASAP after field dressing.

Your knife must be sharp and your hand swift and sure. Entrails not carefully removed will affect taste.

Where’s the Ice?

Deer, after death, are still warm. It is critical to get everything iced ASAP. Sometimes, it is not possible to have the deer under ice within the 2 hour window.  At least have bags of ice in the body cavity by that time.

MDH* disagrees with the paragraph above & he has valid points: Putting precious ice in a warm body is a waste. He opens the body cavity to cool down, while he does other parts of processing (depending on the temperature, he may be skinning the deer, also to cool the carcass).

Skinning may be a great plan in 40 degree weather (or less). However, when it is warmer, the best plan may be to quarter the animal and  get it into coolers.

He also disagrees with the idea that a deer must be under ice within 2 hours.  It’s a great goal, but not always practical, especially if you’ve shot the deer miles from homebase.

A Lifelong Deer Processor Says …

1) “Get it Clean

2) Get it Cold

3) Get it Cut”

Dave and Ruth, of  http://www.best-venison.com have a wonderful site.  They show so much info that is helpful to a hunter: “venison cuts charts, visual aids and estimating your yield.”

The PRICELESS CATEGORY, however, is: “Venison Value.” Show this to your wife next time she tells you hunting costs too much. (Of course this is based on the assumption that you have shot a deer!)

Did You Know?

Venison does not freeze until it cools down below 28 degrees.

Next Time

January 1, I’ll finish this article with other ways to reduce ‘gamy taste’ in venison.

Have a wonderful New Year!

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*MDH = My Deer Husband, or “He who likes to be obeyed.” (but rarely is)

** Indicates some info was added after publishing. Added “Did You Know?” info. Changed title slightly.

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#2 of 3: Removing the “Gamy” from Wild Game!

Reduce 'Gamy Taste' with These Tips!

Where Does ‘Gamy’ Come From?

Generally, experts agree that that “gamy” taste is a by-product of improper handling of the game, after bringing the game down OR before cooking.

What are some examples?

• Leaving an animal in the snow (dusk shot), to field dress in am
• Not field dressing animal ASAP
• Not completely removing entrails
• Not rinsing cavity with clean water, soon after field dressing
• Not getting animal on ice as quickly as possible
• Not processing the animal within a day or two of harvest
• Not rinsing carcass after skinning; hair, etc., creates off-flavors
• Your deer’s diet – from wooded acreage, probably has more gamy taste
• Deer on agricultural & suburban areas – better diet = better taste
• Hauling game home exposed – in/on the truck/vehicle

Dave Adds

As an experienced deer processor, Dave (of  http://www.best-venison.com) has seen it all and has the photos to prove it. Look around his site for other info on reducing gamy taste.

• Dave indicates that leaving bone-in the venison contributes to the gamy taste.
• He believes “aging” deer can add gamy taste. See his suggestions.
• He also indicates anything less than “double wrapping venison” for the freezer is a bad idea.

The Big Question

Essentially, the real question you should always be asking yourself is, “If this were beef from the grocers, how would I handle this piece of meat?”

Taming “Gamy” Before Cooking

Check out this site:  http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/07333/837468-34.stm Steve Loder, author of 3 wild game cookbooks, gives an interesting explanation of venison’s fat being the source of much of it’s ‘gaminess.’

His theory and solutions are too lengthy to cover here, but he has the credentials to know his subject and give great advice.

Methods to Reduce Gaminess

There are many ways to remove the wild taste. At eHow, http://www.ehow.com/how_2067752_get-wild-taste-out-of-deer.html -check out the  idea there.

To Tenderize & Remove the Wild Taste

• Before we fry the backstrap of the deer, we marinate the meat in milk for ~24 hours.
• Cut up a pineapple – mix pressed pineapple slices, pulp, juice with meat chunks (or slices), cover, place in refrigerator for a couple of days, then use. If you are using a large piece of meat, increase the amount of fresh pineapple.
• Buttermilk is another popular marinating liquid

Try venison in tomato-based dishes, such as meatballs and spaghetti sauce, lasagna, chili, etc. The tomato masks (or removes, I’m not sure which) the wild taste.

Do any of you cooks have any other ways to reduce the gaminess in venison or other game?

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Last Joke of the Year: An Engineer Goes to Hell

Have a Devil of a Great Time Tonite!

(Folks: Obviously, an engineer wrote this, in spite of the title! You will see why in a minute!)

An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates.  St. Peter checks his dossier and says, “Ah, you’re an engineer — you’re assigned to hell.”

So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of accommodations and starts designing and building improvements.

After awhile, they’ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators and — the engineer is a pretty popular guy.

One day, God calls Satan on the telephone, and says with a lordly air, “So, how’s it going down there in hell?”

Satan replies, “Hey, things are going great. We’ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators.  There’s no telling what  what our engineer is going to come up with next!”

God replies, “What??? You’ve got an engineer? That’s a mistake — he should have never gotten down there; send him back immediately!

Satan says, “No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I’m keeping him!”

God says, “Send him back up here or I’ll sue!”

Satan laughs uproariously and answers: “Yeah, right. And just where are YOU  going to get a lawyer?”

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As always, “Thanks” to Dorothy139!

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Here’s hoping you and yours have a wonderful and safe NEW YEAR!

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How to Take Up Hunting; How do I Start Hunting?

Targeting a New Sport!

This question, asked on this site earlier last week, has required some thought. Traditionally, relatives have taken youngsters under their wing by ’showing them the ropes’ and taking them on hunts and fishing expeditions.

With single parent homes, this tradition has fallen away. Fewer than 3% of hunters and anglers are now under 17 years of age. (For more info on this, see my earlier articles: Where Have All the Hunters Gone? parts 1 & 2, and Why Should You Get Your Kids Interested in Hunting?

A Generation of Non-Hunters & Anglers

I’m surprised to read how many people are trying to get started hunting and/or fishing. This is a wonderful sign, but it must be difficult for newcomers. How does an adult experience something he/she didn’t learn earlier?

Here’s the list, then I’ll explain.

Find a mentor/friend.

Would-be hunters need to take a Hunter Education class.

For anglers, take Boater Education class. (or like-named course)

Get proper license(s).

Start target practice, sighting in gun, with help of friend or mentor.

Go on a fishing or hunting trip (or 2 or 3) with mentor/friend (possibly using his/her extra equipment).

Now, go purchase gun and/or fishing equipment.

Getting Started

Finding a mentor will simplify the task greatly. You’ve probably heard hunters and anglers talking about their latest trip. Take someone you feel friendly toward aside and ask if you might join him/her.

Contact your state “parks and wildlife” department for info about hunter and/or boater education classes. These courses discuss archery, as well as conventional firearms.

Texas Parks & Wildlife Internet site is: http://www.tpwd.state.tx.us and their telephone # is: 800-792-1112. They can direct you to info about your state.

Bear in mind, even learners must have a license to fish or hunt. Most sporting stores, gun shops and Wal-Mart have the annual issued by your state on this year’s hunting and fishing regulations.

Pick up a copy and read it carefully. Ignorance to the law isn’t considered a valid excuse for breaking a game law. A ticket can really dim your enjoyment of the sport!

Archery, Guns, Equipment

Most sporting newbies want to hit the  gun shops first. However, you lack the skill or experience to make a great choice. By borrowing or renting equipment, you have an opportunity to ‘test drive’ before you buy.

Finally

In my experience, hunters & anglers are a very generous group. Just letting others know you are interested is enough to get you started – in most instances.

But remember, once you are an experienced hunter/angler, share your knowledge with others! I’ll bet there’s a youngster in your family who would love to join you!  Pass it on!

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Did I leave something out? Share your knowledge with others! Leave a comment!

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#3 of 3: Getting the “Gamy” Taste out of Wild Ducks, Fowl, Etc.**

"American Wigeon in Flight"

Re-reading the two posts regarding “gamy taste” in wild game, the tone of the pieces seem to be focused on venison.  Perhaps a few words on wild ducks, wild geese, wild turkey, wild fowl, would be appropriate.

Why Wild Duck Tastes Different

In truth, wild duck, goose, turkey, etc., have a different taste than domesticated (the ones you can buy in the frozen meat cases). Wild game has not been ‘fattened up’ for the market, nor has it been fed special foods  - and diet truly does affect a bird’s taste.

A Step on the Dry Side

The ‘wild ones’ symbolize “what-you-see-is-what-you-get.”  And that is the beauty of wild game – no hormones were added – it is just natural food.  Because wild game has not been fed a diet of fats and things you cannot pronounce, it tastes dry.

Tips With Quail

Before freezing, quail may be skinned or plucked. For more moisture and flavor, pluck, rather than skin. Quail can be kept in the freezer (at 0 degrees) for 9 – 10 months – if placed in vapor/moisture proof containers or wrapping.

Fried Quail

4 quail, 1/4 cup flour, salt and pepper

After dredging quail in flour mixture, fry in hot fat. Brown on both sides. Cover skillet and reduce heat. Cook slowly until tender, ~ 20 minutes, turning once to brown evenly. Serves 4.

Ideas for Marinating Ducks & Birds

If your ducks are fish-eating animals, it is best to marinate in wine, buttermilk or vinegar. If the game is an older goose or duck, marinating your animal in the refrigerator for 4 to 12 hours will improve flavor.

These older birds respond well to 1/2 tsp. salt and 1 Tbsp. vinegar per quart of water. This mixture will improve flavor and tenderize the flesh.

Dining on Duck

Wild duck, which is a dark meat, is most flavorful when served rare. I’ve found that roasting a duck in a closed pan – after adding a few strips of bacon (across the carcass) – really makes a difference with large and less-tender birds.

The only way I cook ducks is with bacon (strips) and/or in gravy.  They need the moisture provided by these, plus a closed pan.

Wild Goose

Young wild goose  is wonderful: little waste, the meat is rich, dark and lean. Unfortunately, older geese don’t seem to get better in moist heat.  Given a choice, tell your hunter to aim for the youngster.

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One thing I forgot to  include with the venison info: Venison does not freeze until it cools down below 28 degrees.

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** Altered title slightly.

This series includes:

#1 of 3: Can You Take the Wild Taste Out of Venison?

# 2 of 3: Removing the “Gamy” from Wild Game!

# 3 of 3: Getting the “Gamy” Taste out of Wild Ducks, Fowl, Etc.

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Truck Decals: When You Want to Show Your Independence & Style!

Hum-Vee Good Lookin'

Tired of the same old, same old? Are you sick of your vehicle looking “cookie-cutter” – like all the other vehicles on the road?

Declare your independence from the ho-hum!   Strike out on a new path of snap and sizzle!

A Whole New Vehicle!

Being a wallflower is highly over-rated! Get your buggy noticed – for all the right reasons!

People stop and stare at this Humvee; there may be a million of them on the road, but they don’t look like this!

The beauty of this is that CamoClad is matte – so wildlife won’t be able to spot the shine. CamoClad is also removable.

It is not unusual for folks to cover their new truck/SUV, use it for years and remove the vinyl sheeting just before selling.  They report that they are able to sell their vehicle for about the cost of the original CamoClad!

Why? Because the paint job, under the CamoClad is protected. This product, when removed, leaves no residue; the truck looks new!

But I Just Want Some Accents!

Add some zip to your ride!

CamoClad has you covered.  Wrap your eyes around these vinyl strips – added to maximize your vehicle’s good looks!

These are also removable – without sticky residue or damage to your vehicle’s paint finish!

Let’s Camo My Window!

CamoClad Window Film!

CamoClad also has a line of window film, that matches their patterns for your truck. This line is “+50% view through as required in most states.”

7 Minute Video

CamoClad has a 7 minute video demonstrating the process of applying this 3 M product.  I’m embarrassed to admit I haven’t figured out how to embed video yet (Heh, we didn’t need all this new-fangled stuff when we crossed on the Mayflower!). So I’m going to send you there …. http://www.camoclad.com/camoclad_101.php

On the left side, look for these words: Click here to view our streaming video tutorial on installing Camoclad on you vehicle!

I know this is lame, but you should cut some slack for the elderly!  You have no idea how hard it is to type on this laptop while sitting in a rocking chair!  

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The Story of an 8 year-old & an Uzi

Submachines & Kids - A Deadly Combo!

Christopher Bizilj (bah-SEAL’) of Ashford, Conn., and his father, Charles, were on their way to Westfield Sportsman’s Club.

A Machine Gun Shoot and Firearms Expo

Pelham Police Chief Edward Fleury owns the COP Firearms & Training, which was sponsoring the Machine Gun Shoot and Firearms Expo.

The show sounded like fun:  An advertisement said it would include machine gun demonstrations and rentals and free handgun lessons.

“It’s all legal & fun — No permits or licenses required!!!!” reads the ad.

“You will be accompanied to the firing line with a Certified Instructor to guide you. But You Are In Control — “FULL AUTO ROCK & ROLL,” the ad said.

Hundreds Came to the Show

The machine gun shoot drew hundreds of people to the sporting club.  Charles Bizilj said his son had experience firing handguns and rifles but the gun show was going to be his first time with an automatic weapon.

With his father 10 feet behind him, reaching for a camera, Christopher took the Uzi in hand and fired.

Chritopher lost control of the 9mm micro submachine gun as it recoiled while he was firing at a pumpkin. He  shot himself in the head.

Legal Outcome

Police Chief Edward Fleury was indicted on involuntary manslaughter, as were Carl Guiffre of Hartford, Conn., and Domenico Spano, of New Milford, Conn.

The latter two men brought the submachine gun to the show after assurances from Fleury that it was legal under Massachusetts law, District Attorney William Bennett said.

Mr. Bennett has a different spin on the issue:  ”A Micro Uzi is made by and for the Israeli Special Forces. This weapon has a rate of fire of 1,700 rounds per minute. It is not a hunting weapon.”

Fleury and the club also were indicted on four counts each of furnishing a machine gun to minors.   The club faces a fine of up to $10,000 for each violation.

The Real Tragedy

The “Instructor” who was with Bizilj was a 15 year old who was neither “certified” nor “licensed.”

How does a 15 year-old live with this tragedy for the rest of his life? How do Christopher’s parents reconcile themselves to his loss?

Why Bring This Up Now?

Granted, this is old news; it happened at the end of October. However, we are heading into “Gun Show season” soon.

These extravaganzas are great fun and good learning experiences.  However ….

Ask questions about the set-up, before handing a weapon to a youngster. Ask yourself a question – or two.  Is your child mature enough to handle a gun that shoots live ammo? Can he/she adjust to the recoil?

Safety takes seconds! Grief like this can last a lifetime!

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Do You Like Your Venison Chili HOT?

Say, where's the Pepto-Bismol?

Actually, you can substitute ground beef in this chili recipe, if you like. Recipes like this are for folks who like to eat their chili with the fire department’s phone number on speed-dial!

Curl Your Toes Hot Venison Chili

2 lbs. lean venison stew meat, diced

1 Tbsp. olive oil

1 3/4 cups chopped onion

1 cup diced celery

3 cloves garlic, crushed

3 cups water

3 (14 1/2 oz.) cans no-salt-added tomatoes, undrained & diced

2 (10 oz.) cans diced tomatoes with green chiles, undrained

2 Tbsp. chili powder

1  1/2 Tbsp. reduced-sodium Worcestershire Sauce

1/4 tsp. dried whole thyme

1/4 tsp. dried whole oregano

1/4 tsp. ground cumin

1/4 tsp. salt

1 (14 1/2 – 16 oz.) can no-salt-added kidney beans, undrained, optional

Brown venison in hot oil in a dutch oven, stirring until it crumbles. Stir in onion, celery & garlic; cook until tender.  Add water and next 8 ingredients; bring to a boil. Reduce heat, and simmer, uncovered, 2 hours, stirring occasionally. Add beans and cook 30 minutes more. Adjust seasonings and enjoy.

Slow Cooker Directions: Brown venison in hot oil in a dutch oven. When it is almost cooked thru, add onion, celery & garlic; cook for 5 to 8 minutes.  Pour this mixture into the slow cooker, adding water, tomatoes and tomatoes with chiles.

Cook 6 to 8 hours. Add spices, Worcestershire Sauce and beans (if desired). Cook 30 minutes more on low.  Adjust seasonings and enjoy.

Note: Adding spices to a slow cooker at the beginning, just cooks the flavor out of  those spices. I do not add them until the last 30 minutes.

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

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The Other Wild Game – The Mosquito!

The OTHER Wild Game!

This has been a glorious day, 68 degrees with lots of bright sunshine. Then I realized that I was not missing something — mosquitoes.

It’s easier to get nostalgic about a pest that isn’t there; so I started thinking about the tough life of a mosquito. By the end of this tale, I’ll bet I have you crying in your beer for those little savages!

How Far Will a Mosquito Go for a Bite?

Folks, this is the really grim news: Studies at Florida A&M University confirm sightings of black marsh mosquitoes as far as 20 miles from shore!

The good news is that they weren’t looking for lunch, they are usually goofing off, riding the wind currents.

No matter what you’ve heard, mosquitoes aren’t always looking for a ‘meal deal.’ In fact, they can only smell you 60 yds. away!

Actually, the whole reason you’re bitten is that you entice them with your magical CO2 and lactic acid emissions! If you would keep your smells to yourself, they wouldn’t come to check you out!

When is the Best Time to Avoid These Parasites?

I detect a note of nastiness (parasites, indeed)! If you go out on the water (in the boiling sun) at midday, air currents are heavier then.

Mosquitoes have more sense than to be out in them. So they leave you to boil instead of  being bitten. Nice choice, right?

Guys Don’t Have a Long Life Line!

The boys have one role in life – procreate and then get out of the way! Boy mosquitoes don’t need anything provided in blood, so they don’t bite!

All they do is fertilize eggs and join the Great Mosquito in the Sky. Poof! They are history in 4 days!

It’s Those Girls You Need to Watch!

Yep, the girls need the protein and amino acids found in (your) blood – so they can form their eggs. But this next fact will knock your socks off!

YOU are not a mosquito’s first choice! In fact, you are pretty far down their food chain.

Most of the 2000+ mosquito species — wouldn’t have you on a silver platter! They go in for birds and tender frogs! How’s  that for reverse discrimination!

Send Them Back to the Frogs!

Before going outside, slather on some “eau de Citronella” perfume or Avon’s Skin-So-Soft. That makes you stink (to a mosquito) and I doubt you will get too many compliments from your spouse either!

Finally

Anyone crying in their beer? Oh well.  Bummer!  I’ll try harder next time.

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I’d be honored if you joined me!

Turkey #1: Let’s Talk Turkey — Hunting the Wild Ones!

One Wild Turkey!

This has been such a beautiful day, can spring be far behind?’

Today, I’m going to begin a series on hunting turkey. However, I’d like to  share a few words about the remarkable restoration of the turkey in the US.

Turkey 101

In 1959, the total turkey estimate (in the US) was: 465,809.  By 1990, the number of these graceful birds had risen to 3.5 million! According to Wikipedia, current turkey totals are over 7 million!

This revitalization of the wild turkey has come about because of hunters! Through their licenses, fees and excise taxes, turkeys have been trapped and released to new areas by state wildlife departments.

Turkeys are available for hunting in every state except Alaska!  These beautiful fowl are available in at least 10 new states – places they did not originally live.

The Skinny on Turkeys

The Latin name is ‘Meleagris gallopavo’ and they have been in North America for thousands of years.  The turkey has learned to thrive in a variety of habitats.

Originally, they lived out their lives in and around timber regions. However, they have learned to adapt to agricultural and even plains areas.

There are 5 subspecies

Eastern turkey – has the largest numbers.  They are available along the eastern coast from Maine to northern Florida, and as far west as Oklahoma.

Merriams –  live in the western US.

Osceola – live only in Florida.

Rio Grande – reside mostly in Texas, but range as far north as Kansas and as far south as Mexico.

Gould’s Wild Turkey – lives mostly in central Mexico and some reside in New Mexico.

BTW, each has unique characteristics that call for specific hunting techniques.

A Little Terminology

Gobbler - adult male, usually 2 years of age + , all tail feathers are same length; overall – looks black, with red/white/blue head

Jake -  young male, middle tail feather is longer than the others

Hen – female adult, smaller and duller in color than males; overall – looks dark brown

Jennys – young hens

Truth is Stranger than Fiction

1) Male turkeys have beards – which are made up of modified feathers. It is not unusual for a male to have more than one beard! 

2) One in 20 females has a beard!

3) Habitat determines a wild turkey’s weight. They average about 20 lbs. in the agricultural areas of the Midwest. In other areas, they average somewhat less than 20 lbs.

4) Turkey hunters tend to be more interested in the size of the turkey’s beard and spurs, rather than their weight!

UPCOMING:

Turkey Behavior You Need to Understand;

Preseason Ideas for the Turkey Hunter;

and more!

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

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Want to be the first in your neighborhood with the latest info? Well, step right up and pick the way you’d like your daily dose!

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Part 2: HOT Venison Chili

When You're Hot, You're HOT!

There must be some serious chili-heads out there! The first edition of hot venison chili has been the most popular posting this month.

Please have your “Directive to My Physician” and your “Last Will & Testament”  in an obvious place, before you start on this recipe. The EMT won’t have a lot of time to hunt for your last wishes!  ;)

A HOT BOWL OF RED

20 dried chili peppers*

4 lbs. venison – chili grind (can use beef)

1 tsp. oil

1 medium onion, chopped

4 to 5 cloves garlic, minced

1 tsp. oregano

1 tsp. cumin

1 can tomato sauce

3/4 cup water

2 to 3 Tbsp. masa flour

Salt & pepper, to taste

Remove stems and seeds from chili pods. Wash and put into a large pan; cover with water. Simmer until tender. Drain. Place peppers in food processor or blender and puree. Set aside.

Brown meat in oil. Add onion and garlic; simmer 10 minutes. Then add oregano & cumin.

Add chili peppers to meat; add tomato sauce and an equal amount of water. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer for 3 to 4 hours. More water may be added during cooking.

When almost done, thicken by adding hot water to masa flour. Stir until it thickens; add to chili. Adjust seasonings. Serves 8 to 10.

Directions for Slow Cooker: Remove stems and seeds from chili pods. Wash and put into a large pan; cover with water. Simmer until tender. Drain. Place peppers in food processor or blender and puree. Set aside.

Brown meat in oil. Add onion and cook ~10 minutes. Add pepper puree and meat mixture to slow cooker.  Add tomato sauce and an equal amount of water. Cook for 6 to 8 hours. Add water, as needed.

About 30 minutes prior to turning cooker off, add garlic, oregano, cumin, salt and pepper.

Then thicken by adding hot water to masa flour. Stir until it thickens; add to chili. Adjust seasonings.  Serve.

* I’ve never had the courage to use 20 pods at a time. They are referring to the large red pods sold dried – often in plastic bags.

Note: Adding spices before cooking  (for several hours), boils the flavor out of these ingredients. I add them 30 minutes before finishing, for that reason. However, this is a personal decision, not law.

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

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Tomorrow: Back to ‘talkin’ turkey’

Talkin’ Turkey 2: Typical Behaviors

Look at beard hanging from chest!

To be successful, hunters need to understand the behavior of the wild turkey.

Don’t let this bird out-psyche you! Remember, he has a brain the size of a walnut.

Maybe, with lots of repetition, you might even start to believe it!

Talkin’ Turkey

These fine feathered fowl don’t have a morsel of curiosity in their entire beings! If they become concerned about a sound, they leave — immediately.

Turkeys have sharp eyes and big mouths. It’s the big mouth that usually lands him/her on your dinner table.

I believe turkeys were the ones that created “Twitter” — they are very social and want everyone to know what they are doing.

Turkey Calls

Our fine friends make a variety of noises that are understood by their companions. Let’s talk about a few of the basic ones.

Yelp – An important sound, especially during spring turkey hunts. Both gobblers and hens yelp; in the spring, hens use the yelp to attract the guys.

Tree Yelp or Call – This call comes from the hen while she’s still roosted.  Hunters use this call early in the morning. It is not really different from the regular yelp; however, it is a softer call.

Kee-Kee – This is a favorite of the juveniles and is also known as a whistle. Although mostly heard in the fall, hunters often use it successfully to lure a ‘big boy’ in the spring!

Clucks – All turkeys cluck; they just vary the tone and loudness. This is known as social chit-chat and a great way to call another turkey.

Cackle – Hens are the masters of this call and they use it while flying up and down from a roost. This is a difficult one to do well; most hunters learn the cutt call instead. Hens use this call when they are on the ground

All turkeys  purr. The sound is soft and shows contentment.

Alarm Putt – At the first sign of danger, this is the call a turkey uses to warn others.

Lend Me Your Ears!

I didn’t waste time describing the sounds of each of these because I have something better.  The National Wild Turkey Federation has a site complete – with sound effects. Take a listen here:  http://www.nwtf.org/special_events/calling_contest_turkey_calls.html

Finally

Come back for more exciting revelations about this beautiful, sneaky bird!  Coming up: Mating Behaviors, Things a Hunter can do Preseason, Jakes and Hens: Should You or Shouldn’t You Shoot Them?

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Wild Photos: A Ram Stops A Chevy In its Tracks!

New Photos from MDH* – He says this must have happened in Montana, because of the State Trooper’s badge.

Ram Jumps into the Path of a Chevy!

This Ram Made Quite an Impression on this Chevy!

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MDH* = My Deer Husband

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This is short because I’m sick again. Hope to be back soon!

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Turkey #3: Mating Ritual in the Spring

Anxious Gobbler Looking for a Hen!

During the dark days of fall, gobblers tend to flock together. But as the longer days arrive, gobblers separate, jakes leave the hens and hens start dreaming of new poults in their nests.

Thus, the increased sunlight of spring summons the turkey’s mating ritual.

Getting Ready for the Mating Dance

Over time, the gobblers establish a pecking order within their group. The dominant bird does the breeding. Since he isn’t into nappies and raising the young, he constantly scurries off to find (yet) another mate.

Wildlife departments schedule spring hunting season during this time that turkeys breed.

The same bird that “doesn’t do nappies,” also expects the females to  come to him. Spring hunters call gobblers, hoping the male will do the opposite of what happens in nature — the gobbler going to the hen-sounding hunter.

Peak Gobbling Periods

The two times turkeys “gobble-obble” most are – during spring mating season and when the hens start their nesting. Most of the breeding is finished by the nesting, but big gobblers become more aggressive and try to find the remaining receptive females.

Gobbling starts as soon as daylight starts to appear, while turkeys are still in their roosts. Once the gobblers hit the ground, they start calling hens in earnest. This calling continues until the warmest hours of the day.

Just before it is time for the evening roost , males start some serious calling. They may have been looking “in all the wrong places,” but “at closing time,” all the hens start to look beautiful.

They don’t want to roost alone, so they may start their strut.  The strut  is actually the way most turkeys are shown (see photo): chests out, wings down and tail feathers in full array.

Finally

Biologists believe that the midmorning hours are when most mating occurs.  Weeks before this takes place, hens start looking for a nesting place (usually on the  ground). They prepare the spot and start to roost nearby.

It takes the hens 10 to 15 days to lay the whole clutch (group) of eggs. She feeds before and after laying.

If, while she is feeding, the nest is attacked and destroyed, she will breed again while creating a nest in another location.

It takes about 26 to 28 days for the poults to emerge.

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Come back for further adventures with our hens, poults and gobblers!  They walk, they talk, they gobble!

Will the little poults survive?  Will their fathers care?  Stay tuned.

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Go, Richard! Houston Marathon Sunday!

Richard at the San Antonio Marathon! Photo is from 11/2007

MDH* runs the Houston Marathon each year. This is his 11th. This is also his 2nd year to be a Pacer.

A Pacer helps newbies reach their target — to finish the race. What does that really mean?

Travelling 26.2 miles is a difficult thing to do. Doing it on your own is even harder. By having someone set the pace (’We will jog for 3 minutes and fast walk for 2′), it teaches newer runners how to run, while reserving strength for the full 26.2 miles.

Pacers seem to be a fairly new innovation – one that has earned the instant gratitude of newbie runners. More runners are able to finish the Houston Marathon because of the Pacers.

If you are watching the race on TV, watch for the tall man carrying balloons with his pace-time — 5:15.

This will also be Richard’s 70th race — that includes marathons and ultra-marathons.

Our family is very proud of Richard! (BTW, next week, Richard turns 62!)

*MDH = My Deer Husband

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This is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

The Answers to: How Do I Sharpen My Knives?

Visually Stunning Damascus Knives!

Almost every day, someone asks about sharpening knives. Some are concerned about serrated knife sharpening, while others are looking to hone a pair of scissors correctly.

Everyone knows it is easier to learn by seeing, rather than reading an explanation. To that end, I have found a series of excellent videos on these issues:

How to Sharpen Serrated Knives

Sharpening Specialty Knives: Pocket, Combat, Custom

Common Knife Sharpening Devices

Knife Sharpening Techniques for Steel

Knife Sharpening Angles

And a couple of other titles!

Videos @ Expert Village

The videos are done by Thomas Stuckey:  Thomas Stuckey of Knife Sharpest has been sharpening knives for 20 years. He also designs and crafts custom knives.

These videos are quick and easy; take a look!  Go to: http://www.expertvillage.com/video/118271_how-sharpen-serrated-knives.htm

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This is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Great Photos: That Wild Boar was Where? **

18 February 2009: Jan found these photos on the following site: http://www.naturetours.com.tr/approches/approches.htm These photos are real – but the ‘big boy’ was killed in Turkey.

Jan says: “I don’t think they’re doctored (being in graphics for a long time). They’re shot at angles that make the boar appear bigger.”   Thanks again, Jan!

13 Febuary 2009: Dr. Dave notified me that these photos have been doctored. Keeping with my promise to keep stuff up, even if it showed me to be in error (as long as it did not harm others), here are the photos.

You can read the comments below and decide for yourself!

1800 Pounds of Ugly!

Get a load of what was running wild in Turkey! (error: said North Louisiana!)

I Doubt a Mom Could Love THAT Face!

Why the glum faces, guys? You got him before he could run off all the tourists!

This guy brings new meaning to the word, “Porky!”

If you saw more than 1,800 lb. of wild boar coming at you, what would you do?

Run for dear life?

Climb a tree?

or

Become a muddy splat in the road?

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This is the poster boy for ’saying your prayers’ at night!

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MDH sent this a few minutes ago. Thanks!

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** Indicates changes were made after this item was published. See notes under headline.

Today’s Joke: The Catholic Dog

Muldoon and his dog in better days!

Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for
company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest
and asked, ‘Father, my dog is dead. Could ya’ be saying a mass for the
poor creature?’

Father Patrick replied, ‘I’m afraid not; we cannot have services for
an animal in the church. But there are some Baptists down the lane,
and there’s no tellin’ what they believe. Maybe they’ll do something
for the creature.’

Muldoon said, ‘I’ll go right away Father. Do ya’ think $5,000 is
enough to donate to them for the service?’

Father Patrick exclaimed, ‘Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus! Why didn’t ya
tell me the dog was Catholic?

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Many thanks again to Dorothy139!

Recipe: Stuffed Wild Goose

Stuffed Wild Goose, On the Wing!

For best taste, field dress a goose immediately.  There’s a super site that demonstrates the best way to clean a variety of fowl.

I suggest you try this: Delta President Rob Olson Demonstrates Techniques to Prepare Ducks for the Table.

Getting Ready to Cook

Young goose is a rare delicacy, with a minimum of waste. The meat is: dark, lean, and oh-so-rich.

Before your hunter leaves for the day, put your order in for a YOUNG goose. Old birds don’t take to most tenderizing methods.

The Marinade

Ducks or geese can be marinated in vinegar, wine or buttermilk. A quick way to get buttermilk is – just add a teaspoon vinegar to each cup of milk, stir and use.

Another marinate: add 1 tsp. salt and 1 Tbsp. vinegar per quart cold water. Immerse the fowl in this solution (in the refrigerator) for 4 – 12 hours, to improve flavor and tenderize.

STUFFED WILD GOOSE

1 young goose, 6-8 months, ready to cook (already marinated)

juice of one lemon

salt and pepper, to taste

1/4 cup butter or margarine

1/4 cup chopped onion

1 cup chopped tart apple

1 cup chopped dried apricots

3 cups soft bread crumbs

4 to 6 slices bacon

Melted bacon fat

Sprinkle goose inside and out with lemon juice, salt and pepper.  Melt butter or margarine in a saucepan. Add onion and cook until tender. Stir in apple, apricots, bread crumbs, salt & pepper.

Spoon stuffing lightly into cavity. Truss bird. Cover breast with bacon slices and cheesecloth soaked in melted bacon fat.

Place goose, breast side up, on rack in roasting pan. Roast @ 325 degrees (20 to 25 minutes/pound), or until tender, basting frequently with bacon fat and drippings in pan.

If age of goose is uncertain, add 1 cup water into pan and cover last hour of cooking. (I’d suggest you ask a goose’s age before shooting him/her.)  

Remove cheesecloth, skewers and string. Serves 6 to 8.

A word about the cheesecloth: Wild goose has very little fat. Bacon fat and basting — are two things that moisturize the meat, and keep it from drying out.

To that end, cheesecloth is a convenient way to keep a layer of fat on the bird during cooking.

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This is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

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Do you TWITTER?   I do!    Go to: http://twitter.com/marylouise22.com, click on ‘home’ and  come-follow-me!

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Come back tomorrow and vote in my poll: What do you want to read about on my blog?

The Plural of “Thermos”

Just to prove that we work 24/7 to satisfy the insatiable

Working like a dog to find the answers!

curiosity of our readers, here’s the answer.

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ther·mos (thûr’məs) — Pronunciation Key
n. plural = ther·mos·es
A vacuum bottle used to keep beverages hot or cold.

[Originally a trademark.]

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
Copyright © 2006 by Houghton Mifflin Company.
Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

~~~

I know, I know…. now you want the question. (Some of you have been watching “Jeopardy” too long!)

WordPress has a nifty tool that tells us how people find our site. Believe it or not, someone was searching for the plural of “thermos.”

Back, when dinosaurs roamed the earth, I wrote an article joking about the plural of ‘thermos.’  I said I thought it should be ‘thermi.’

Based on this obscure reference, a search engine send some poor student of the English language to my site. The least I can do is set the record straight!

Probably, it’s too late for that person, but I’ve made it my personal goal to seek and report the right answer.

Now I can take a rest! Whew! This ice is cold!!

It’s Friday. Some Absolutely Worthless Info!

Ghillie Suits for Kids!

This has been a hard week.  Since Friday has FINALLY arrived, let the silliness begin!

As I have mentioned before, WordPress has a nifty tool that tells us how people find our site.  Usually, seekers enter words into the search engine, and Google, or others, try to find a page with info to help.

Real Ghillie Suit

I certainly hope the seeker does not find a real ghillie suit.  About 20 years ago, MDH Richard brought dozens of burlap bags to me and asked if I’d make him a ghillie suit.

Obviously, I wasn’t in my right mind when I said, “Sure!” At that time, ghillie suits had just become available to hunters. The price tag was way outside our budget.

So I started to cut, stitch and itch!  The burlap bags reeked; the stray fibers filled my sewing machine and lungs.

When I finished, I took a much-needed rest cure in a German sanitorium for folks who have taken in more dust particles than brain cells.

As they carried me off, I yelled to Richard, “I’m sure it looks great. As soon as my eyes stop oozing and my face shrinks back to its normal size, I’ll take a look! Have fun hunting.”

Actually, I learned that the original isn’t always the best. Those suits were hot, itchy and stank! It didn’t take long before manufacturers changed to lighter, washable fabrics …. And, I learned they were well worth the price!

Hunting Clothes for 7 year-olds

This is the second Wordopress item of interest.  Even though there are fewer kids out hunting, they are dressed better than ever before!

Until this past holiday season, I didn’t even try to carry kids’ ghillie suits. Why?

No one could keep ‘kids hunting wear’ in stock! I don’t think manufacturers had an inkling how hot (popular) these suits would be!

If you are planning to get one of these suits for your junior hunter this fall, buy it out-of-season.

Ok, so today won’t be a total loss, here’s a hunting joke. I found it @ http://huntingjokes.thejokeindex.com

Today’s Joke:  He Walks on Water

An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him.

He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, the eternal complainer who refused to be impressed with anything. This, surely, would impress him. He invited him to hunt with him and his new dog.

As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. This continued all day long.

The complainer watched carefully, saw everything, but did not say a single word.

On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, “Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?”

“I sure did,” responded the complainer. “He can’t swim.”

How Can I Clean the Animals Mounted on my Walls?

He doesn't like to be dusted!

There are 2 answers for this question.  First: How important is it to still be married when you finish this cleaning process?

A Difference of Opinion

Therein lies your problem — husbands have a different perspective on “mounted deer cleaning.”  My idea of cleaning is: Get all the dust-bunnies to take-a-hike and tear down the lovely spider webs spread between the antlers.

My husband’s view of this “deer cleaning” is: “Make this buck look like the day I brought it home from the taxidermist’s. His eyes should shine brightly — without any spider webs looped between his eyelashes.

When I look at him, I want to be able to relive the exciting first few seconds — when I zeroed in on this deer!”

My Reaction

I understand that it is impossible to yawn and roll both eyes at the same time.  So, I don’t try.  However, I do let my eyes glaze over.

How can this man turn cleaning (a dead deer, pinned to a wall)  into an emotional activity? Does he let my birthday become an emotional activity? Not on your life!

A Cleaned Deer Must be ‘A Guy Thing!’

In graduate school, we didn’t study this phenomena in either Advanced Sociology or Abnormal Psychology.

When I can’t find evidence in either of these texts, I chalk it up to — “It’s a Guy Thing!”  It’s safer that way!

Solution #1

If you have all your insurance paid up, you might try vacuuming the floor & running up the wall and catching that dirty deer napping.  Zip around his antlers carefully & try not to bunch up his fur.

This solution isn’t for everybody – like folks that have no where to go when ordered out of the house!  The next solution is strictly for the “sissy-set.”

Solution #2

Use a  feather duster to get the webs to loosen their grip on the antlers.  A soft, round makeup brush is great for dusting the eyelashes, whiskers and the base of the antlers.

If I have all day,      I use the same brush to stroke the fur (downward only), pausing often to clean the brush in a damp cloth. (This is a GREAT technique to use while your husband is watching. He will be SO impressed!)

If I don’t have all day, I use a can of compressed air. Spraying with the hair (not against the hair growth), it is a fairly quick operation.

Two Warnings

1) I don’t “do eyes.”  I know they are only glass marbles, but I don’t touch them. Others, much braver than myself, spray windex on a Q-tip and gently clean them.

2) Our mule deer really likes it when I take the makeup brush to his inner ears. However, once you start this, he will nag you constantly for another ear cleaning.

Finally

After a few years of mounted whitetail deer/mule deer/squirrel/mongoose cleaning,  be careful, they start to talk to you …. Maybe that should be the 3rd warning!

Recipe: Roasted Quail with Mushrooms

Quail: Quick & Delicious!

For best taste, field dress quail as soon as possible.  Because of their small size, quail are easy to do. For a video refresher course, see Rob Olson’s site.

Skin or Pluck?

Quail can be plucked or skinned. However, more flavor and moisture are retained in the meat if you leave the skin on the bird.

Freeze the meat immediately if  you don’t plan to serve the quail the next day.  Using quality vapor & moisture-proof wrapping or containers means the food may be stored in the freezer for 9 to 10 months (at 0 degrees, or lower).

Two More Tips

1) A friend (with freezer space) opens 1/2 gallon paper milk cartons, adds the birds (a meal’s worth), adds water to reach the 3/4 mark — and freezes the closed cartons. With this freezing system, he never has freezer-burned birds!

2) Thaw frozen quail in container or package — in the refrigerator — for 12 to 24 hours.  Our county extension nutritionist says this is a great way to tenderize the meat.

Roasted Quail with Mushrooms

4 quail

4 slices bacon

1 Tbsp. butter or margarine

Juice of half a lemon

1/2 cup hot water

1  small can of mushrooms, drained

Wipe quail inside and out. Wrap a slice of bacon around each quail. Put birds into a buttered pan and roast at 350 degrees, basting occasionally — about 30 minutes, or until tender.

Remove birds and add butter or margarine, water and lemon juice to the drippings in the pan, stirring to make a gravy.  Add mushrooms.

Serve the birds on toast with gravy poured over them.

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This is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

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Do you TWITTER? I do! Go to: http://twitter.com/marylouise22.com, click on ‘home’ and come-follow-me!

I notify my followers of new articles — as they are posted. Be the first person on your block with a “tweet” from a Twitterer!

(Please don’t confuse this with a “tweet” from a Twit!)

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What is the Definition of a ‘Spike’ Deer?

Unbranched Antlers

According to the dictionary, a spike is an unbranched antler of a young deer.  Therefore, a spike deer is one that has unbranched antlers.

Before you get dewy eyed about this cute creature, please be aware that it is not what you want in your deer herd, if you are trying to manage for better deer yields.

Same Song, A Different Verse

If you are interested in  learning about this issue, I’ve written a series of 4 articles about ‘when to take (harvest) spike deer.’

Don’t take my word for it: Texas Parks & Wildlife and Texas A & M University have done extensive testing to prove their claims.  My articles rephrase and explain their hypothesis.

1) Should I Shoot a Spike While Hunting White- posted  21 Nov. ‘08

2) Why Don’t We Just Let that Little Spike Grow Up?      24 Nov. ‘08

3) What About Spikes While Whitetail Deer Hunting?     26 Nov. ‘08

4) “This Spike is Better Lookin’ Than Any Ol’                      28 Nov. ‘08
6 Point Deer!”

In a Nutshell

For those who just read the last page of a book: Spikes do not carry the genes for gorgeous racks. Culling them from the herd, before they can breed with the does, reduces their numbers – eventually.

This leaves antlered deer to breed and pass on their genes for full racks.

Does have an important role in all of this and TP&W also offers advice in this area.  From what I’ve read, managers who have taken their advice have noticed improved yields from their lands.

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This posting is in response to a question asked online recently.

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This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

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Turkey #4: Just How Long Do Wild Turkeys Take to Breed?

Turkeys on the Trot!

Ben Franklin wanted the Wild Turkey to be America’s symbol to the world. Considering the way we toss around the word “turkey” (”Boy, that movie was a turkey!”), it’s just as well Ben didn’t get his wish!

The Mating Ritual Begins

As days get longer, this signals the beginning of the turkey mating season. Generally, the season takes place in March and April.

The tranquil lives of these birds suddenly starts to change. Gobblers (mature males) that have travelled together all winter, separate. Jakes (young  males) leave the hens and the hens start dreaming of new youngsters (poults).

These birds begin to act more aggressively (against their own gender) and the talking increases. Gobbling, generally, has two very active phases.

As sexual excitement starts to build, the gobbling increases. Gobblers are calling to females, expecting them to come to the male’s call.

Hunting Season Comes During Mating Season

There’s a major season of mating and then a shorter, later season, when females are starting to nest. At this point, males are more insistent and aggressive.

Lots of turkey hunters think that gobblers get sloppy during this later season — and are easier to catch off-guard.

Game wardens set turkey season during this time of increased activity. The birds are paying more attention to each other — rather than to hunters.

The Male Turkeys

All males operate through a rigid pecking order. The dominant male mates the most.

Since males are not worrying about taking care of any newborns, they have plenty of time to preen, strut and spit (the spit sounds like a sharp -’fsssst’).

Uninterrupted, the large birds take only seconds to mate.   After a male finishes mating with one hen, he immediately looks for another.

Mating Season for the Hen

A few weeks before breeding, hens are looking for a nesting area, away from their winter roosting area.  She builds the nest on the ground, concealed in dead tree debris, in dense grass, etc.

After mating, she tends to lay ~ an egg/day.  Over the span of 10 – 15 days, she lays ~ a dozen eggs.

Before and after laying, she will feed and and rest in the near vicinity of her nest. Once incubation begins, she begins to talk and turn over her eggs. Incubation lasts between 26 and 28 days.

The dozen, or so, poults are born over the span of 18 hours, using an “egg tooth” to chip his way out of the egg. Amazingly, the chipping is in a fairly straight line around the wider edge of the egg.

Next time: The life of a Poult! Sheer Excitement!

~~~

In case you’re wondering, this article is offered in response to a question asked recently.

~~~

This is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Mosey On Over to January’s Highlights: Did You Miss Any?**

Our Winter Round-Up of Stories ***

Perhaps you have just joined this brilliant band of blogites and have only read a few posts. Well, I’d like to tell you about this month’s hottest!

Most Hits This Month

Hands down, the most popular article this month was:  “Good Grief! A 30 Point Deer! Shot with a Handmade Long Bow!” Over 2100 people viewed this photo in the last 30 days.

“Amazing Photos” – Most Popular Category

Lots of you are into “Amazing Stories.” This month, I posted three photos from Louisiana (thanks to MDH*): “Great Photos: That Wild Boar was Where?” This has been the most active posting of an item presented this month!

“Removing the Gamy Taste” Blogs Are Popular

The set of 4 ‘Removing the Gamy Taste‘ blogs really struck a chord with readers. The daily readership (of one or more of the articles) has been great!

On the recipes front, ‘Recipes #11: Deer Chili in a Slow Cooker‘ has been very popular this month. With all the cold weather we’ve had, lots of folks have fired up their slow cookers!

My Website

Massive changes are coming to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com Everything will change – color-scheme, and all.  Bear with me; I hope everything will be finished  by the second week in February.

This month I’ve spent more time answering questions than in the past.  It will take a bit more time to see if this is meaningful to most of my readers.

“Turkey Hunting” Series

This series is moving right along. I’m writing about a season that doesn’t start for a more than a couple of months because I’ve learned that the hunters who prepare for the season are more successful than the average hunter.

I was surprised to find out how much there is to learn about turkey hunting. I’m learning as I write; biologists have really broadened our understanding of these big birds in the last few years.

Turkeys may not be the brightest boys on the block, but they are noble adversaries — wily and shrewd are two words that come to mind.  As a hunter, the more you know about them, the better your chances are of feasting on one of these great birds!

Thanks for reading. I love writing!

~~~

* MDH = My Deer Husband; also known as “He Who Likes to be Obeyed” – sadly he rarely is.

FYI: ** are added when I add info to a posting after it is published.

*** Yes, the photo is clickable. It is a rear window graphic I sell on my site.

~~~~~

There are two ways to get a FREE subscription: Subscription button for feeds (top of right column) or Subscription link to get my postings via email (Click area is near “Top Posts”).

Although these postings/articles are PRICELESS, I’m making them available to YOU for nada (also known as: zip, zilch, zero). Can you really afford to miss out on this opportunity?

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Looking for a “Hole in One” for Your Rear Window?

Where's a Gust of Wind When You Need it?

Although I thought long and hard for a cute, clever way to introduce a new graphic, the creative juices aren’t flowing today.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve had several requests for a golf graphic.  (Drum roll) Presenting a new full-color …

Golf Graphic

My supplier offers one  rear window graphic with a golfing theme. It is available in sizes to fit most vehicles:

(To jump quickly to the correct page, click on the size you need)

Window Graphic – Gimme (Golf) – small truck (16″ x 54″ )

Window Graphic – Gimme (Golf – regular truck (20″ x 65″)

Window Graphic – Gimme (Golf) – large vehicle (30″ x 65″)

Photo is Click able

Because there are 3 pages with this design, if you click on the photo, it will take you to the “Specialty Graphics” page.

The Golf graphics are on the second row (just under the NASCAR rear window graphics).

~~~

This is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

~~~

Do you TWITTER? I do! Go to: http://twitter.com/marylouise22.com, click on ‘home’ and come-follow-me!

I notify my followers of new articles — as they are posted. Be the first person on your block with a “tweet” from a Twitterer!

(Please don’t confuse this with a “tweet” from a Twit!)

~~~

Turkey #6: Just How Much Land Do You Need for Turkey Hunting?

Turkeys: The Proud Crowd!

Pull out your hankies! This is going to be sad news.

Biologists Have Been Counting

As I mentioned recently, biologists have added greatly to our store of knowledge about turkeys and their habits.

Who would have thought it?  Biologists claim that turkeys can travel between 1 and 2 miles per day.

That general statement, however, doesn’t take into consideration the terrain the gobbler is on or which of the 5 types of turkeys we’re discussing.  If the area these ‘big bird’  herds are in will not support many birds, they range further.

A Recap – 5 Types

Eastern turkey – has the largest numbers. They are available along the eastern coast from Maine to northern Florida, and as far west as Oklahoma.

Merriam’s- live in the western US.

Osceola – live only in Florida.

Rio Grande - reside mostly in Texas, but range as far north as Kansas and as far south as Mexico.Gould’s Wild Turkey - lives mostly in central Mexico and some reside in New Mexico.

Back to  Our Original Question

Taking into consideration variances in terrain and types of turkey, the picture changes!  Under these circumstances, turkeys range from 50 acres to 5 miles!

The only good news in all of this is that turkeys don’t migrate.  They seem to acclimatize to an area and stay close — unless something scares them away or the land will no longer support them.

How Fast Can Gobblers Move?

Turkeys can run as fast as 15 mph – on the ground!

They can fly up to 55 mph!

Thanks for the Question

I probably wouldn’t have written about how much land is needed to hunt for turkeys, had a reader not asked the  question. You’re keeping me on my toes!

Next time: Survival Techniques Turkeys Use to Stay Off Your Table

~~~~~

There are two ways to get a FREE subscription: Subscription button for feeds (top of right column) or Subscription link to get my postings via email (Click area is near “Top Posts”).

Although these postings/articles are PRICELESS, I’m making them available to YOU for nada (also known as: zip, zilch, zero). Can you really afford to miss out on this opportunity?

~~~

This is a companion to my website: EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Turkey #5: Which Baby Turkey (Poult) Hatches First?

Mama Hen's New Recruits!

As a spin on the age-old question, we pose a new one – Which poult hatches first?  Is it the first egg laid by the mother hen, or the last?

Answer: No one knows!

Another Puzzle

No one understands how the poult can peck his way out of his egg with an ‘egg tooth’ that chips a nearly perfect line around the upper edge of the larger end of the egg.

In fact, that is how one can immediately surmise the outcome of the nest: If the eggs are smashed, a predator got to the eggs before birth. Otherwise, the eggs have clean pecks around the edge, as if the poults were unzipping themselves from their cocoon.

Early Lessons

If you recall high school biology, ‘imprinting’ is the process by which a baby learns to recognize her mother, her voice, her commands.

This bonding takes place in the first 24 hours; sometime before hen and poults leave the nest.  Once born, the nest becomes a liability for the hatchlings and mom.

The hen needs to feed the youngsters and predators abound. For the first couple of weeks, the chicks and mom are ground-bound.

Life of the Average Poult

Although the poult can fly at the end of the first week of life, the hatchling spends all his time preening, feeding, peeping. He relies on ‘dear old mom’ for warmth and security.

Between Day 14 and 20, the poult is able to move to the tree roost with his/her mom. The determining factor seems to be the weather; if the weather’s too cool,  the poults would rather stay snuggled up to Mom – on the ground.

The constant stream of  chatter is actually school-time for the youngsters. By the time they can roost in trees, they have developed quite a vocabulary.

They have also started to find their place in the family’s pecking order. Interestingly enough, the pecking order can change over time.

“Feed Me! I’m Yours!”

Poults need high protein meals at first: Bugs and grasshoppers. The wider the chicks range for food, the more likely he is to be attacked by hawks, and other predators. Generally, being in open, exposed areas makes attack more likely. As months pass, turkey chicks learn to thrive in their habitat.

By the first leaves of fall, the poults have merged into young turks. Their diet has changed from bugs and leaves to acorns and other foods on the forest floor.

However, they may find themselves in the cross-hairs of a hunter’s gun, if they learn to raid corn from his deer feeders.

Soon: How to Out-Smart a Turkey’s Survival Instincts

Turkey #7: Survival Skills Turkeys Use to Stay Out of Your Oven

Turkey Survival Tricks 101

Turkeys have brains the size of a walnut. But don’t let that fool you — they use every trick they can to survive a meeting with a hunter.

Gobblers are Sociable

The group provides warnings of danger for its members.  The good news is that there are lots of  ’false alarms.’

Ultimately, each gobbler is responsible for his own safety.  When an alarm sounds, everyone pauses and checks the nature of the danger.

If the bird does not see any danger, he returns to feeding.  The bad news is that turkeys lack a single gene of curiosity! If the noise concerns him, the gobbler leaves.

The Gobbler’s Senses

The sense of smell in a turkey is about the same as ours.  Their hearing is not much better than ours. However, their eyesight is another matter.

Because of the particular placement of their eyes, their peripheral vision is excellent.

Turkeys & UV-Brighteners on Clothes

Frankly, I hate to open this can of worms again.   Deer and turkeys see colors. They are adept at seeing the UV-Brighteners in hunter’s clothing.

If you want to learn the full story on UV-Brighteners, please refer to these articles:

10/1/2008    Hunting News: Why You Just Might Not Get a Turkey or Deer this Year

10/3/2008    A Few More Facts About Deer Hunting (actually covers deer and turkey issues)

10/8/2008    Anyone Out There? Questions for My Reader(s)!

11/3/2008     UV Brighteners: We’ve Got the News

Why I Don’t Care About UV Brighteners

In those articles, I’ve protested that  someone is making a wonderful income by preying on hunter’s fears.

(In the last article, I name names — there are companies that produce laundry products that do not add UV Brighteners to hunter’s clothing. They are available on your grocer’s shelves.)

Biologists have proven that turkeys are not startled by bright colors — ONLY COLORS THAT MOVE!

They’ve placed bright objects in front of these big birds.  In one test, they put bright orange hats on turkey decoys. Turkeys strolled amongst them with no concern — unless the orange hats moved!

Biologists theorize that bright colors abound in nature. Turkeys are used to random brights and darks in their habitat. They are only troubled by movement — not the colors.

There’s scads more to talk about, but UV-Brightener discussions wear me out.  

Coming Soon: Hunter Strategies to Out-Smart Turkeys

BTW: You  may be wondering how I can speak with such assurance. I read everything I can get about a subject, take notes and  share the most interesting with you.

There’s one resource that I’ve used extensively in this series: The Complete Book of Wild Turkey Hunting, by John  Trout, Jr.; 2000, The Lion’s Press.

Today’s Humor: TEXAS HOME SECURITY SYSTEM

He's Never Had a Bite He Didn't Like!

TEXAS HOME SECURITY SYSTEM

HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM

1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men’s used size 14-16 work boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with several empty beer cans, a copy of Guns &Ammo magazine and several NRA magazines.

3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads: Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went to the gun shop for more ammunition. Back in a few minutes or so. Don’t mess with the pit bulls — they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don’t think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood.

PS – I locked all four of ‘em in the house. Better wait outside.

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As always: Thanks to Dorothy139

~~~

This is a companion to my website: Easy Online Ordering.com

How Knives Are Changing

There was a time when one could learn the names of 6 or 10 knives, and be set for life. Over the next 40+ years, you would not expect much to change in the knife world.

If you have looked around lately, you realize those days are long gone.

All those ‘Rambo’ Wanna-Be Knives

Drop Point Skinning Blade

Remember when we drooled over the “cool” factor of Rambo-styled knives? Now, emergency medical technicians, the military and police routinely use those knives because they offer job-specific tools, such as seat-belt cutters, safety blade tips and wire cutters.

It seems that “if you can dream it, you can make it” in the world of knives. Individual craftsmen keep pushing the envelope of invention and technology continues to provide more techniques and materials.

Hunting Knives

The era of specialization has hit hunting knives, as well as most other types of knives. MDH’s* favorite pocket knife looks like an arcane memento from the past.

Although made of stainless steel, his knife wouldn’t know what a knife lock was! It was made in the day when honing one’s knife was a ritual that a man passed on to his son.

Now we have hunting knives specific to each task: gut-hook knives for field dressing and small, sharp knives for caping deer  - as well as other close work.

Specific AND Generalized Knives

Actually, you can have knives both ways: very specific tools or generalized instruments. Some knives labeled hunting and camping knives can do everything from food preparation to skinning and butchering wild game.

Most of the hunters I know have  about a dozen knives – but tend to use 2 or 3 faves.  Once folks find a tool that feels good and works well, they tend to find more uses for that tool.

Safety Has Become More Important

Twenty years ago,  blades had slip joints or basic locking mechanisms. Now, most knives come with high-tech locks, plus other safety features to avoid lock failure.

Who would have ever thought we would have knives with replaceable blades? Or locking sheaths? Or knives that keep their edge for years?

The Future of Knives

The future looks very rosy. Sportsmen and women are willing to pay for innovation. The prices charged for knives as collectibles seem to increase every week.

With knives, people have learned that “you get what you pay for.”  As more people try crafting their own knives, they have come to appreciate the craftsmanship of both the very old and the very new.

Knives and You

If you have thought about collecting knives, prices will probably never be lower. Jump in soon!

Because of the ever increasing improvements in today’s knives, you may be shocked by the huge variety of knives available to hunters and anglers.

My problem is that I’m afraid to buy today for fear that tomorrow they will improve it so much, I’ll have to have that one too. Maybe that is the definition of a “knife collector.”  Hmmmm.

Some Humor for Friday: 5 Nuns

Thanks to my friend, Dorothy139, for today’s sight gag! Several Catholics have been passing this around on the Internet. Hope you enjoy it!

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Sisters Mary Catherine, Maria Theresa, Katherine Marie, Rose Frances, & Mary Kathleen left the Convent on a trip to St. Patrick’s Cathedral in New York City and were sight-seeing on a Tuesday in July.

It was hot and humid in town and their traditional garb was making them so uncomfortable, they decided to stop in at Patty McGuire’s Pub for a cold soft drink.

Patty had recently added special legs to his barstools, which were the talk of the fashionable eastside neighborhood.

All 5 Nuns sat up at the bar and were enjoying their Cokes when Monsignor Riley and Father McGinty entered the bar through the front door.

They, too, had come for a cold drink — when they were shocked and almost fainted at what they saw.

(scroll down)
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GIVE US A SENSE OF HUMOR LORD,

GIVE US THE GRACE TO SEE A JOKE,

TO GET SOME HUMOR OUT OF LIFE,

AND PASS IT ON TO OTHER FOLK!

~~~~~

Have a great weekend!

I’m out of town for a couple of days;

when I get back, we’ll resume

the Turkey Series!

~~~

This is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Turkey #8: Which Gun Will You Be Using to Shoot Wild Turkeys?

Taking Aim at Turkey Season!

Bringing down a wild turkey is one of the great highs in hunting. Your adversary is cunning and fast.

In order to be successful, often you must convince a gobbler that you are a hen, pining to mate with him.  Practicing your turkey calls is an important pre-season activity.

In many situations, your turkey calling expertise will mean the difference between failure and success.

There are lots of tools available to help you perfect  a range of calling patterns.  Pre-season (now) is a perfect time to be honing your calling skills.

Shotguns and Gobblers

Although it is true that it is legal in some states to use a center-fire rifle, most hunters prefer to use a shotgun. Although gun makers offer a variety of shotguns specifically for turkeys, you may have one that will work fine.

The goal in using a particular shotgun is to get a tight spray pattern up to 40 yards.  Generally, your old, full-choke shotgun  can do this well.

Aiming at a Wild Turkey

So we are all on the same page, do you know where to aim your gun?  Unless you shoot a gobbler at less than 20 yards, a body shot will probably only cripple the animal.

Remember, a turkey’s feathers can absorb a lot of shot. It is better to shoot at the gobbler’s head and neck; a tight pattern will strike the vital organs and fell the animal immediately.

The Choke on Your Shotgun

If you are not getting that tight pattern with a full choke, you may be able to change out the choke tubes to an “extra-full choke.”  Remember, the goal is to kill the bird quickly, not injure or cripple him.

Single, Double, Pump or Side-by-Side?

Which shotgun do you prefer?  Gobblers “take their own sweet time” coming into view.  While you are waiting for “just the right shot,”  a heavier gun can quickly become a liability.

According to some hunting experts, today’s favorite turkey hunting shotgun is  ”a 12-gauge with a three-inch chamber.” *

Come back tomorrow; this subject is too broad for a single posting.

Next time: Adapting Guns for Women and Children

Soon: Choosing the Right Load for Turkey Hunting

Soon: Archery Equipment for Turkey Hunting

Coming: Turkey Hunting Clothes and Accessories

And Several Other Items ….

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* This is the conclusion of John Trout, Jr., in The Complete Book of Wild Turkey Hunting, 2000, The Lyons Press.

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This blog is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Turkey Hunting #9: Choosing the Right Load for Your Shotgun

"This Bad-Boy's Body Can Absorb/Repel Puny Shot!"

On 9 February, I wrote the following:  ’The goal in using a particular shotgun is to get a tight spray pattern up to 40 yards.’

Getting that tight spray (to kill the turkey – in the head, not the body), requires your shotgun and ammo to work together.

Popular Shot Sizes and Loads

The pellets in the load must be large enough, and powerful enough, to fell the turkey immediately. A body shot is not optimal; turkey feathers can absorb/repell. Take a look at a gobbler – he’s well-padded.

According to MDH, * Lead Shot #4’s or 6’s seem to do the job well. (Remember, the smaller the #, the bigger the pellets are – in the load).

A Useful Graph *

To clarify my meaning –

– — – — – — – — – — – — The # of pellets in a load — – — – — – — – — – — –

Lead Shot             1 oz. load     1.78 oz. load     2 oz. load     2.25 oz. load

Size

# 4                                 135               253                    270                  304

# 6                                 225              422                    450                   450

_________________________________________________________

* This graph is from The Complete Book of Wild Turkey Hunting, by John Trout, Jr. 2000, The Lyon’s Press, p. 46.

Back to Our Goal

The same load in two same gauge shotguns may produce very different shot patterns. The best way to be sure of shot placement is to practice – until you get the shot scatter you need.

However, MDH says most hunters (he knows) go in for on-the-job testing. In other words, many hunters assume it works (or have enough experience to know what works) and don’t really practice.

A Sight for Your Shotgun?

If you shoot turkeys at less than 50 yards, you probably won’t need a telescopic sight. They may be helpful for seeing turkeys in dim light or while trying to find the big birds in the brush.

Another group that finds a low-powered scope to be helpful are those hunters with poor eyesight.

Generally, MDH’s friends use an open sight.

Your Homework

Are you still practicing your turkey calls? Unless you plan to wait for turkeys to cross your path, you’d best invest in some turkey callers — and start practicing.

Gobblers spend so much time strutting, spitting and preening, they aren’t usually in a rush to find a hunter. Unless you are good at calling, you may have a long wait before the “big boys” take a stroll past your hiding place!

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* MDH = My Dear Husband or “He Who Likes to be Obeyed” ….But Rarely is!

~~~

This blog is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Six Clothing Tips for Turkey Hunters

These are 6 clothing tips for turkey hunters.

Camo Wear Patterns

Hunter's Face Veil

Found some camo wear in the “Clearance” section of your store? BEWARE! Some of those ‘3-D camo’ and ‘movable leaves’  wear that you will find on clearance racks are a bad investment. Why?

If they move on a still morning, turkeys don’t wait to see why they moved. They quickly make tracks — in a different direction!

New Clothes Shine

Shiny new clothes may be great for church, but are a poor idea when hunting turkeys. Why? Turkeys have sharp eyes.  A shiny watch strap, glittery watch and reflections off of clothing are dead give-aways!

Keep in mind: Turkeys that survive the first weeks of hunting learn about shiny objects and hunters. They get smarter as the season wears on.

I’ve already written lots about what to use when washing your hunting wear. Mosey on over to “UV Brighteners: We’ve Got the News,” (published here in November 2008), where I name names of the  products that will not add UV Brighteners to your clothing.

Critical Elements of Hunting Clothing

If your hunting clothing meets all of these criteria, your clothing will not impede your ability to  snag a turkey: comfortable, safe (nothing to hang up on branches, gun barrels, etc.), and silent (no noise, no matter how slight).

As a test:  Rub your clothing (pants legs or sleeves) together. Well-washed cotton garments generally are silent. However, some garments with lots of polyester can sound very loud!

Outerwear for Hunting

Some guides suggest “mix-and-match”  – green camo over brown camo (pants). In other words, they are suggesting you wear the same pattern, with differing colors.  There’s a lot of controversy about this idea.

I’m going to side-step it and suggest coveralls. They are versatile; on hot days,  wear a single layer cotton coverall.

On cold days, wear underlayers (of wool, cotton, whatever) for extra insulation.

Pockets

Another reason I like coveralls, is that they seem to have an endless supply of pockets — deep and roomy — to carry the endless list of “must-haves:” gloves, turkey tags, shells, calls, etc.

Face Nets vs. Black Make-Up

A few years ago, everyone wore black face makeup – to reduce face shine. Now, however, the trend is towards face veils or face nets.

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This blog is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

A Call to Action: Ammunition Accountability Legislation

A Plan to Take Your Ammo!

It has already started…

Ammunition Accountability Legislation

Remember how Obama said that he wasn’t going to take your guns? Well, it seems that his allies in the anti-gun world have no problem with taking your ammo!

The bill that is being pushed in 18 states (including Illinois and Indiana) requires all ammunition to be encoded by the manufacturer into a data base of all ammunition sales. So they will know how much you buy and what calibers.

Nobody can sell any ammunition after June 30, 2009 unless the ammunition is coded.

Any privately held uncoded ammunition must be destroyed by July 1, 2011. (Including hand loaded ammo.)

They will also
charge a .05 cent tax on every round so every box of ammo you buy will go up at least $1.00 or more, a brick of 22’s will go
up enormously!

If they can deprive you of ammo they do not need to take your gun!

This legislation is currently pending in 18 states: Alabama, Arizona, California, Connecticut, Hawaii, Illinois, Indiana, Kentucky, Maryland, Mississippi, Missouri, New Jersey, New York, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina, Tennessee and Washington.

Send to your friends in these states AND fight to dissolve this BILL!!
To find more about the anti-gun group that is sponsoring this legislation and the
specific legislation for each state, go to:
http://ammunitionaccountability.org/Legislation.htm

“We cannot expect the Americans to jump from capitalism to Communism, but we can
assist their elected leaders in giving Americans small doses of socialism until they suddenly
awake to find they have Communism.”

- Soviet Leader Nikita Khrushchev, 1959

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I could not believe this was true and checked with Snopes;  Snopes.com says this is “undetermined.”

~~~

“Thanks” to Dorothy139 for letting me know about this issue!

~~~

Turkey Hunting #10: Pre-Season Work for Hunters

Males & Females Spend Fall & Winter Together!

If you have access to the land you will be using for turkey hunting, now is the time to “get the lay of the land.”

Spend Some Quality Time

Knowing where the turkey roosts are – before the season begins – is an incredible advantage. Getting your searching done, without gun and all the other “stuff’ you take hunting, will make the task easier.

In fall and winter, the turkeys (males and females) travel in large bunches. In early spring, just before mating season, the bird groups separate. They each have important things to do.

The males work out their dominance “issues” between the young  jakes and other – more seasoned – gobblers.

The girls are out scouting for safe nesting areas, for the new “youngsters to come.”

Favorite Areas

As mentioned in a previous post, turkeys seem to favor agricultural areas, bottomlands and the woods.

Since turkeys have been introduced to new areas, *  they have adjusted to their new environments — even the edge of desert regions!

Gobblers seem to need to chatter; so listen for their gobbling. Gobblers talk year-round, with a huge increase before and during mating season.

Once the two genders separate, their roosts can be a long distance from each other.  The boys tend to give their location away through their (increased  and noisier) gobbling.

Once you have found turkeys, sit and watch for awhile. Listen to the calling and gobbling. What is the reaction of the other birds? When do they gobble? When do they “kee-kee?” Do you hear any “lost” yelps?

What’s the Pay-Off  for Advanced Scouting?

By doing this searching now, when the season starts, you can move in, take your limit and go home.

As the turkey season progresses, it gets harder to snare a gobbler. Turkeys are not stupid.

Remember their ‘fatal flaw’ (in a hunter’s view): Turkeys are not curious critters. They live to see another day by following one rule: ‘If I cannot locate/recognize the source of a noise, LEAVE immediately.’

* Turkey numbers dropped to ~ 40,000 in the 1930’s.  Wildlife departments of many states worked  to rebuild the herds by introducing them to locales where they had never lived before. Herds are now over 8 million — and growing!

Remember: Your fathers and grandfathers paid for the re-population of this mighty bird, through the excise taxes on guns, ammo, licenses, etc.!

The truth is that hunters are conservationists, too! Without hunters, turkeys would be extinct!

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This is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Shotgun Shell Patterning

(This has nothing to do with shotguns or patterning; it IS very funny.  Don’t freak out about it being a German site; there’s no speaking. Yes, I know it’s poking  fun at women drivers — it’s still priceless! )  http://de.rofl.to/frauen-fahren-auto-compilation

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Anatomy of a Shotgun Shell

A Tight Spray Pattern

The choke on your shotgun and the shotgun shells you use determine the spray pattern. (Yes, I know wind velocity and other things have an effect.)

If you are a Newbie, it is important to understand that the shells used in one gun may create a completely different pattern in another gun.

A 30 Inch Target

Firing a few shells will give you the opportunity to determine if that particular brand is going to give you the ‘tight pattern’ you want for hunting.

Basically, there are two things you want to

Check the Shotgun Pattern

know. (1) Do most of the pellets fall within the 30 inch circle? If they don’t, can you modify your choke to concentrate the shot or spread out the pattern?

(2) In looking at the pattern created, are there ‘holes?’ Holes are areas (inside the  30″ ring) with no pellet shots. Depending on the size of the blank areas, it may indicate that if an animal was standing in that spot, it would escape being your supper.  Will a different brand do better?

Game and Shot Size

Each shot size is effective for certain game.*

Game               Lead/Tungsten        Steel Shot

Pheasant          4 to 6                                     2 to 3

Turkey              4 to 6                                     2 to 3

Quail, dove      7 1/2 to 8

Rabbit                6 to 7 1/2

Squirrel             6

Ducks, low        4 to 6                                  2 to 3

Ducks, high       2 to 4                                 BB to 2

* This graph and the picture of the shotgun shell were extracted from Wikipedia, “Shotgun Shells”

BTW, US law requires the use of non-toxic (steel, bismuth. tungsten, etc.) shot while hunting waterfowl.

Lead vs. Steel Shot Sizes

Lead is heavier; it flattens and deforms on impact. Lead tends to create a wider pattern and carries farther.

Steel is lighter and does not deform on impact. It creates a narrower pattern, but does not carry as far as lead.

Shot size Equivalence: Steel vs. Lead

Steel            6-4           2           BB         BBB        T

Lead              6              4            2

Did You Know?

Ammunition requires careful handling. I am not referring to locking it up separate from weapons — to protect kids.

Certain things can be dangerous to ammo: excessive heat, contact with sharp objects or high impact. Be sure to check the condition of your ammo before loading.

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Come back next week for more exciting adventures!

This is a companion to my website: www.EasyOnlineOrdering.com

Turkey Hunting #11: Outsmarting Loners & Small Gobbler Groups

I Think Somebody's Confused!

While hunting, you have to take the turkeys as they come. Two distinctly different types are:  loner gobblers and small groups of 2 or 3 young